104 BEST Disney Jokes That are Truly Magical!

Disney is no doubt one of the most magical places on Earth. It is one of the best places to be if you are down and need a little cheer up. Whatever your age is, everyone wants to have a little fairy tale. Take a ride at these Disney jokes and feel like Price Charming and Cinderella all over again. 

Escape from a stressful day with our hilarious Disney jokes that you can tell to your friends and kids!

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For more laughs, read our funny jokes for kids that will bring so much laughter!

We also have the Best Disney Songs Of All Time if you want to sing along with us!


Funny Disney Jokes for Kids

These humorous Disney jokes for kids will make your family laugh during supper tonight! 

Read more: FUNNY California Jokes That Will Make You LOL


What did Snow White call her chicken?
Egg White.

What did Snow White call her chicken


How cold was it at Disney World?
So cold that Donald Duck was wearing pants


How do you keep Pumba from charging you?
Take away his credit cards.


Why did the cookie go to see Doc McStuffins?
Because it was feeling crummy


How do you ask Scar to stop being so mean?
Be a bit more Simbathetic!


Which Disney princess makes the best judge?
Snow White; she’s the fairest of them all.


What did Cinderella Dolphin wear to the ball?
Her glass flipper.

What did Cinderella Dolphin wear to the ball


What do the seven dwarves sing if they see a rainbow on their way to the mine?
High Hue, High Hue!

Laugh more: FUNNY Jokes for Kids About Summer


Why can’t you give Elsa a balloon?
Because she will “Let it go, let it go…”


Why did the banana go to see Doc McStuffins?
Because it wasn’t peeling well.


Why are there no planes where Peter Pan lives?
Because there is a sign that says, “Never Neverland.”


Why is Cinderella terrible at netball?
Because she always runs away from the ball


Why would you not want to be one of Snow White’s dwarfs?
6 out of 7 of them aren’t happy.

Why would you not want to be one of Snow White’s dwarfs


What happened the first time Mickey and Minnie Mouse saw each other?
It was glove at first sight.


Why is Cinderella so bad at soccer?
Because she always runs away from the ball and has a pumpkin for a coach.


What did the rapper Lil Jon say when he visited Disneyland?
Turn down for Walt.


What does Frosty’s wife put on her face at night?
Cold cream.


Why did Goofy stare at the label on the orange juice all day?
Because the carton said “concentrate”


Why didn’t Anna and Elsa’s parents teach them all the letters of the alphabet?
Because they got lost at C!

Why didn’t Anna and Elsa’s parents teach them all the letters of the alphabet


How does the ocean say hello to Ariel?
It waves.


What’s a bee’s favorite Disney movie?
Beauty And The Bees.


Disney Puns

Do you want to learn some Disney humor? We enjoy wordplay and puns, so we’ve compiled a list of amusing Disney puns for your enjoyment. Use these puns as Instagram posts or to annoy your fellow Disney fans. 


Thanks for the offer,
I’ll Mulan it over.

Thanks for the offer, I'll Mulan it over


This is a whole different Belle-Game.


Hmm, it doesn’t ring a Belle.


I’m off to a buy and Belle sale.


We’re alive and Belle.


Meet Gaston, winner of the No-Belle prize.


What do Ariel and her under the sea friends sing at Christmas?
Christmas corals.

Read more: FUNNY Christmas Jokes To Keep You Laughing All Season

What do Ariel and her under the sea friends sing at Christmas


If your name is Ariel, I really think we’re mer-maid for each other.


What did Snow White say when waiting for her photos to be printed?
One day my prints will come.


Ariel loves toast for breakfast, she spreads it with merma-lade.


What does grumpy always ask Snow White for when she gathers fruit?
Sour grapes.


Did you know cows like a Disney movie or two,
Their best watch was Moo-lan.


 

What did Ariel excel at when she was at school?
Algae-bra.

What did Ariel excel at when she was at school


The Disney Ducks are early risers,
Donald and Daisy wake at the quack of dawn.


Where do Tarzan and friends shop?
The jungle sales.


Hello pirates, it’s Smee!


What do Huey, Dewey, and Louie have before bed?
Milk and quackers.


Disney Movie Jokes

You can always rely on Disney films to provide some fun. In their movies, there’s nothing that we don’t like! For parents who have to watch Disney movies with their children over and over, you might have some fun with these jokes. 


What does Woody say whenever he visits a car showroom?
Au-di partner!

What does Woody say whenever he visits a car showroom


Why did Woody buy Bulls Eye some cough medicine?
Because he was so horse.


Did you hear about Nemo’s adventures when he went in to battle?
He got caught behind anemone lines.


What do the Monsters Inc gang like to do in the winter?
They Mike Wazow-ski.


It’s o-fish-al, clownfish are the funniest in the ocean.


What take-away does Lightning McQueen order?
Ka-Chow Mein.


It’s Thorsday, The Avengers favorite day of the week.


Did you hear of the Marvel character that’s always ready for summer?
He’s tan-os.

Did you hear of the Marvel character that's always ready for summer


Which Avenger is always in a hurry?
Black Widow she’s Russ-ian.


The God of thunder’s favorite dessert is always Thor-bet.


Want an Avenger you can trust?
Call on the Credible-Hulk.


How did the Cheshire cat become so wise?
He always reads the mews!


Mickey Mouse Jokes

Here you will find a collection of amusing jokes about Mickey Mouse for children of all ages, teenagers, and people who refuse to grow up. When kids hear these jokes, they will burst out laughing.


Whenever Mickey steps out to perform,
him and his friends bring the ‘mouse’ down.


When does Mickey Mouse hang up next year’s calendar?
New Ears Eve.

When does Mickey Mouse hang up next year's calendar


What is Mickey Mouses’ favorite dessert?
Mice-cream.


How does Mickey feel when he’s having a down day?
Mous-erable.


Did you hear about Mickey’s favorite road trip destination?
It’s Minnie-sota.


Disney Dad Jokes

Dads! How we adore you! We can’t imagine our lives without them and their silly (but endearing) sense of humor. So have al ook since we’ve rounded up a fantastic collection of Disney Dad jokes that we think you’ll enjoy. 

Read more: Best Dad Jokes


Radiator Springs is wheely a great place to live.
You auto swing by some time.

Radiator Springs is wheely a great place to live.


Why did the lions go to Simba’s naming ceremony in Lion King?
Because it was the mane event.


What kind of shoes does Simba wear?
Heir Jordans.


Who’s Mickey Mouse’s favorite pop star?
Britney Ears.


Which Disney Princess is the cow’s favorite?
Mulan.

Read more: Funny Cow Jokes and Puns for Kids


What did Woody say to Buzz Lightyear?
A lot of stuff, there’s 4 whole movies plus some short films.


Why do Texas baseball fans love Chip & Dale?
They’ve been known to Rescue Rangers.

Read more: Funny Texas jokes

Why do Texas baseball fans love Chip & Dale


Halloween Disney Jokes

Are you having a hard time finding scary stories to tell your kids? Well, you might wanna take a look at these Halloween Disney jokes and with these goofy Haloween jokes, they’ll sigh like ghosts. 


What kind of monster loves to disco?
The boogieman.


Why didn’t the scarecrow eat dinner?
He was already stuffed.


Why was the jack-o-lantern afraid to cross the road?
He had no guts.


What do you call a fat pumpkin?
A plumpkin.


Are any Halloween monsters good at math?
No—unless you Count Dracula!

Are any Halloween monsters good at math


Why didn’t the zombie go to school?
He felt rotten!


How do you fix a damaged jack-o-lantern?
You use a pumpkin patch!


The maker of this product does not want it, the buyer does not use it, and the user does not see it. What is it?
A coffin.


When is it bad luck to be followed by a black cat?
When you’re a mouse.


What is a recess at a mortuary called?
A Coffin Break!


Why is a cemetery a great place to write a story?
Because there are so many plots there!

Why is a cemetery a great place to write a story


Bad Disney Jokes (Corny Disney Jokes)

Disney characters are well known and beloved by children that is why Disney movies are so related. They’ve managed to get the interest of both adults and children. Take a look at these jokes and have a good time. 


Why did Mickey Mouse get hit with a snowball?
Because Donald ducked.


What do you get when you cross Pooh and a skunk?
Winnie the P.U.


How do Ewoks communicate?
On their Ewokie-talkies!


Did you know things are so bad that even Captain Jack Sparrow has had trouble making ends meet?
He can barely afford to keep a skeleton crew.


Why did Woody give Bullseye some cough syrup?
Because he was hoarse


Who is always watching over Thor?
His Asgardian angel.

Who is always watching over Thor


Disney Princess Jokes for Adults (NOT For Kids)

Every girl dreams of being a princess once in their lifetime. Who can blame them, right? But if you miss your chance, just laugh about it with these hilarious adult Disney jokes for you. 


Why did Snow White get kicked out of Disneyland?
She sat on Pinocchio’s face and said: “Lie to me! Lie to me!


What’s pink and has seven dents?
Snow White’s cherry!


Minnie told Mickey she wanted a divorce.
He responded: “Are you fucking crazy?!”
Minnie says: No, I’m fucking goofy!”


What did Cinderella do when she got to the ball?
She gagged!


Where is Peter Pan’s favorite place to eat out?
Wendy’s


Why doesn’t Bambi’s friend Thumper make noise during sex?
Because he has cotton balls.

Why doesn’t Bambi’s friend Thumper make noise during sex


Why did Chip and Dale take Daisy Duck to the hospital?
Because they busted a nut in her.


Why was Tigger in the bathroom for so long?
He has Pooh stuck inside him.


Dirty Disney Jokes One Liners

Want some more dirty Disney jokes? This collection is quite interesting! Have a look at these jokes and share them with your friends. 


Did you hear how Captain Hook died?
Jock Itch!


Why do the seven dwarfs laugh when they play soccer?
The grass tickles their balls

Laugh more: Funny Soccer Puns


How do you kill the hunchback of Notre Dame?
Give him a knife and say “Who’s special?”

How do you kill the hunchback of Notre Dame


What did Mulan and her husband name their retarded baby?
They named him Sum Ting Wong!


Why was Anger so furious?
Because Sadness touched one of his balls.


What’s slimy cold long and smells like pork?
Kermit the frog’s finger


Why doesn’t Bambi’s friend Thumper make noise when he has sex?
Because he has cotton balls.


Why did Chip n Dale take Daisy Duck to the hospital?
Because they busted a nut inside of her.


What do you call a nanny that doesn’t flush?
Mary Poopins the toilet.


Why does Peter Pan fly?
Cause you got hit in the peter with a pan, You’d fly too.

Why does Peter Pan fly


Disneyland Jokes

Having a vacation and going to amusement parks are full of adventures. Well, if you are going to Disneyland you might want to bring these Disneyland jokes with you! This is fun. 


When I die, I want to be scattered over Disneyland.
But not cremated.


How does Darth Vader greet visitors to Disneyland?
Welcome to the Park side.


Why did the Croissants take the Donuts and Bagels to Disneyland?
They thought it would be fun for the hole family.


Chernobyl is like Disneyland.
Except the 5 foot tall mouse is real there.


You guys know why Disneyland closed?
It was because of Sneezy.


Disneyland prices are now well over $100 a person.
maybe now they’ll buy Donald Duck some pants.


Did you hear about the kidnapping at Disneyland?
She woke up.


A blond is driving to DisneyLand…
She sees a sign saying “DisneyLand left” so she turns around and drives home.


Summary

So here it is the funniest Disney jokes ever! Some of these jokes are so rapid that you’ll miss them if you blink, and if you do catch them as a child, they’ll fly right over your head. 

Besides this, I highly recommend checking out my 30 favorite dad jokes.

We collected as well:

Jimmy
I am Jimmy, clown at heart. I love silly, funny, nerdy, quirky jokes. So I thought I should start a website about jokes. Why a carrot as a logo? Why not! Here, have a carrot!