lame dad jokes

90 Lame Dad Jokes (Stupid but Funny!)

You know the type, the jokes that make you groan and roll your eyes, but you can’t help but laugh at them anyway.

We all know that dad jokes are a staple in the world of humor. They’re the jokes that dads tell at family gatherings, birthday parties, and any other occasion where a laugh is needed. They’re cheesy, corny, and often make no sense, but that’s what makes them so great. They’re the jokes that make you laugh despite yourself. And we wanted to share that with you today.

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We know that dad jokes can be a bit of a mixed bag. Some are terrible, but some are so bad that they’re actually good. We’ve scoured the internet to find the best of the best, the crème de la crème of dad jokes. The ones that will make you laugh, groan, and maybe even cringe. But most importantly, the jokes that will make you smile.

Laugh more here: Funny Dad Jokes for Kids

Lame Dad Jokes

For those of you who may be unfamiliar, dad jokes are the type of jokes that dads tell that are often cheesy, corny, and sometimes even groan-worthy. But that’s what makes them so great. They’re the jokes that make you smile despite yourself, and we all need a little bit of that in our lives.

We’ve scoured the internet and compiled a list of the best dad jokes out there, the ones that will make you laugh and groan at the same time.

Laugh more here: Best Dad Jokes


What do you call an angry musician flipping someone off?
A song bird.

What do you call an angry musician flipping someone off A song bird.


My wife asked me to go get 6 cans of Sprite from the grocery store.
I realized when I got home that I had picked 7 up.


Why do bees have sticky hair?
Because they use a honeycomb.


My wife asked me to stop singing “Wonderwall” to her.
I said maybe…


What kind of drink can be bitter and sweet?
Reali-tea.


How do you get a country girl’s attention?
A tractor.

How do you get a country girl’s attention A tractor.


If a child refuses to nap, are they guilty of resisting a rest?


Why do dads feel the need to tell such bad jokes?
They just want to help you become a groan up.


I know a lot of jokes about retired people, but none of them work.


Why are elevator jokes so classic and good?
They work on many levels.


What kind of noise does a witch’s vehicle make?
Brrrroooom, brrroooom.


What do you call a naughty lamb dressed up like a skeleton for Halloween?
Baaad to the bone.


What would the Terminator be called in his retirement?
The Exterminator.

What would the Terminator be called in his retirement The Exterminator.


Why do some couples go to the gym?
Because they want their relationship to work out.


What’s the most detail-oriented ocean?
The Pacific.


Did you hear about the kidnapping at school?
It’s fine, he woke up.


How can you tell it’s a dogwood tree?
By the bark.


When does a joke become a “dad joke?”
When it becomes apparent.


What’s Forrest Gump’s password?
1forrest1


I tell dad jokes, but I don’t have any kids. I’m a faux pa.


What does a nosey pepper do?
It gets jalapeño business.

What does a nosey pepper do It gets jalapeño business.


Hilarious Dad Jokes

Dad jokes, as we all know, are a mainstay of humor. Dads use them to make people laugh during family get-togethers, birthday celebrations, and other events. They frequently make no sense and are cheesy and corny, but that is what makes them so fantastic. They are the jokes that you find yourself laughing at anyhow. And we wanted to tell you about that today.

Laugh more here: Best Dad Jokes of All Time


Want to know why nurses like red crayons?
Sometimes they have to draw blood.


What do you call it when a group of apes starts a company?
Monkey business.


What do you call a pudgy psychic?
A four-chin teller.


What did Tennessee?
The same thing as Arkansas.

What did Tennessee The same thing as Arkansas.


My boss told me to have a good day, so I went home.


Why did the man fall down the well?
Because he couldn’t see that well.


Which bear is the most condescending?
A pan-duh!


What’s brown and sticky?
A stick.


Two guys walked into a bar. The third guy ducked.


What did the police officer say to his belly button?
You’re under a vest.


Why was the color green notoriously single?
It was always so jaded.


I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me.

I used to hate facial hair, but then it grew on me.


What did one Dorito farmer say to the other?
“Cool Ranch!”


RIP boiled water—you will be mist.


What do you call two octopuses that look the same?
Itenticle.


What has one head, one foot, and four legs?
A bed.


Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself?
It was two-tired.


I’m so good at sleeping, I can do it with my eyes closed.


How does a penguin build his house?
Igloos it together.


What kind of music do chiropractors like?
Hip pop.

What kind of music do chiropractors likeHip pop.


What kind of shoes does a lazy person wear?
Loafers.


Best Dad Jokes

We searched the internet for the absolute finest, the pinnacle of crude dad jokes. the ones that will make you cringe, chuckle, and groan. However, the most crucial part is the humor that will make you laugh.

Laugh more here: Funny Mum Jokes


It takes guts to be an organ donor.


What does “Rockin’ Robin” do when she’s bored?
Tweet.


Why did the bedding hide their relationship?
They just wanted something pillow-key!

Why did the bedding hide their relationship They just wanted something pillow-key!


You’re American when you go into a bathroom and when you come out, but what are you doing while you’re in the bathroom?
European.


I want to make a brief joke, but it’s a little cheesy.


Why did the coach go to the bank?
To get his quarterback.


Which state has the most streets?
Rhode Island.


I didn’t get a haircut, I got them all cut.


Which U.S. state is known for its especially small soft drinks?
Minnesota.


What do sprinters eat before a race?
Nothing—they fast.


What do you call 26 letters that went for a swim?
Alphawetical.

What do you call 26 letters that went for a swim Alphawetical.


Why is Peter Pan always flying?
Because he Neverlands.


How do you row a canoe filled with puppies?
Bring out the doggy paddle.


Singing in the shower is fun until you get soap in your mouth. Then it becomes a soap opera.


What’s the name of a very polite, European body of water?
Merci.


What’s a crafty dancer’s favorite hobby?
Cutting a rug.


Why is cold water so insecure?
Because it’s never called hot.


Why are spiders so smart?
They can find everything on the web.

Why are spiders so smart They can find everything on the web.


Sore throats are a pain in the neck.


My son asked me to put his shoes on, but I don’t think they’ll fit me.


I’ve been bored recently, so I decided to take up fencing. The neighbors keep demanding that I put it back.


What do you call an unpredictable camera?
A loose Canon.


How do celebrities stay cool?
They have many fans.


Sundays are always a little sad, but the day before is a sadder day.


5/4 of people admit they’re bad at fractions.

54 of people admit they’re bad at fractions.


I’ve been thinking about taking up meditation. I figure it’s better than sitting around doing nothing.


Dogs can’t operate MRI machines. But cats can.


What did the flowers do when the bride walked down the aisle?
They rose.


What does a house wear?
Address.


Why did the scarecrow win an award?
He was outstanding in his field.


What’s red and smells like blue paint?
Red paint.


I lost my job at the bank on my first day. A woman asked me to check her balance, so I pushed her over.


Why were the utensils stuck together?
They were spooning.

Why were the utensils stuck together They were spooning.


Stupid Dad Jokes But Still Funny

We wanted to lighten the mood with a few bad dads jokes before we get into the more serious topics. These are the kinds of jokes that are so terrible that they are amusing. They are the jokes that make you sneer and roll your eyes, but you still find yourself laughing at them.

Laugh more here: Funny Aht Aht Jokes


If you see a robbery at an Apple Store does that make you an iWitness?


Spring is here! I got so excited I wet my plants!


CASHIER: “Would you like the milk in a bag, sir?”
DAD: “No, just leave it in the carton!’”


How do you make a Kleenex dance?
Put a little boogie in it!


Two slices of bread got married.
The wedding was amazing until someone decided to toast the bride and groom.


What has two butts and kills people?
An assassin!

What has two butts and kills people An assassin!


I made a pencil with two erasers.
It was pointless!


For those of you that play Wordle, today’s solution was not easy.
“Easy” is not a five-letter word!


Don’t be worried about your smartphone and television collecting your data…
Your vacuum has been gathering dirt on you for years now.


Did you know the first French fries weren’t actually cooked in France?
They were cooked in Greece.


Want to hear a joke about a piece of paper?
Never mind… it’s tearable.


What do you call a werewolf who doesn’t know they’re a werewolf?
An unawarewolf!


I am terrified of elevators.
I’m going to take steps to avoid them.

I am terrified of elevators. I'm going to take steps to avoid them.


I’m reading a book about anti-gravity.
It’s impossible to put down!


You’re American when you go into the bathroom, and you’re American when you come out, but do you know what you are while you’re in there?
European.


I just watched a documentary about beavers.
It was the best dam show I ever saw!


Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers?
They say he made a mint.

Did you hear about the guy who invented Lifesavers They say he made a mint.


Summary

Dad jokes may be considered “lame” by some, but they always manage to bring a smile to our faces. These 90 jokes prove that even the most corny puns can be hilarious when delivered with the right timing and delivery. So, the next time you hear a dad joke, don’t roll your eyes, embrace the humor and chuckle along. After all, laughter is the best medicine, and dad jokes are the perfect prescription for a good laugh.

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Julia
I am Julia, I love to laugh and I love to make people laugh.