Time-related quips and amusing time jokes for kids are all-time top choices. Now is the ideal time to get some humor about the always baffling idea of time. Whether it’s watching jokes, clock jokes, or jokes on time, our time jokes for youngsters can be delighted in by the youthful and the old the same.
We can’t actually ‘see’ time but, it controls each part of our everyday existence. No one said we can’t make jokes and quips about it! Here you’ll discover the absolute best jokes on time including ‘around what time’ and ‘what time is it jokes,’ time passes quickly jokes, guard dog jokes, watch jokes, clock jokes, and plays on words. We’re certain that the following time you get another watch, you’ll laugh reviewing a portion of the recent memory humor you read here!
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Hilarious Time Jokes
We all know time is precious, so it’s important to make the most of every minute. And what better way to do that than with some clever jokes and puns?
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What is another name for a grandfather clock?
An old timer!
What did the digital clock say to the grandfather clock?
“Look Grandpa, I have no hands!”
Why did Bob Dylan adjust all the clocks?
Because he said, “For the times they are a-changin”
Around what time do most people visit the dentist?
Why did the scientist put a wristwatch into the flask?
He wanted a timely solution to his research problem.
When do you take a clock to the gazebo?
When it’s time out!
Why do rich people buy a lot of clocks?
Because time is money!
How do you know that witches are carrying time bombs?
You hear their brooms tick!
Which animal always knows the time?
A watch dog!
Why did the girl sit on the clock?
She just wanted to be on time!
What do you call it when you put a clock under your desk?
Working over time!
What time is it when an elephant sits on a clock?
Time to get a new clock!
What do unwound clocks say to their owners?
“It’s about time!”
Why should you stop to purchase a clock when you’re running late?
That way, you buy time!
What do you say when you find out that your grandfather’s clock is infested with bugs?
Why is it difficult to bring yourself to get rid of a grandfather clock?
Because it’s a timeless piece.
What do you call it when a shop gives out clocks with half a face at a good discount?
A limited-time sale.
Timeless Clock Watch Puns and Jokes
As we all know, life can be pretty funny at times. Whether it’s a funny situation that you experienced or something someone said to you in passing, there are always laughs to be had. Here are some of our favorite witty time jokes
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Which candy is never on time?
Which dog will always know what time it is?
A watchdog, duh!
If the Leaning Tower of Pisa gets a clock face, it will have time and inclination.
Why do I put the alarm clock in my shoe?
I don’t want my foot to fall asleep.
Once I tried to make a belt out of clocks. It was such a waist of time!
Why should you never dress up as an alarm clock at a fancy dress party?
People might end up winding you up.
How would I react if you get me an alarm clock as a gift?
I’d be alarmed.
What would an unwound clock say to the owner?
It’s about time, boss.
Why do you think there was a clock in the forest?
Because it was a time-out.
If you see a billboard with a picture of a wall clock on it, it’s a sign of the times.
It’s only a matter of time before clocks take over the world.
Why should you never eat a clock?
Because it is a time-consuming process.
Where did the clock finish the race?
Probably wherever it wound up.
Why did the jailer throw the clock out the window?
Because it wanted to see time fly.
What is a grandfather clock called?
I held up my wall clock to the mirror. It was time for reflection.
Why couldn’t you keep the alarm clock in a jail?
Because it kept running out.
Why did the cuckoo come out of its little clock door?
Because it was its time to shine.
What would a robber say to the clock?
Hey you, hands up!
What happens when a clock is hungry?
It always goes back four seconds.
I wonder why the historian measured a clock. Maybe he wanted to know the beginning and the end of time.
Hands down, 6:30 is the best time on the clock.
What is a belt made of clocks called?
Waist of time.
My husband got me a timer clock out of the blue.
I was alarmed!
How did the street clock address the tower clock?
What did tick ask the clock?
“What are you tocking about!”
What is a clever clock called?
What would you get if the clock and chicken cross paths?
I went to the Halloween party as an alarm timer
But it was really irritating when people started to wind me up!
Why do you think the man kept a clock under his work desk?
Because he hoped to work overtime.
What will happen if you annoy a clock?
It will get ticked off!
Why did the boy hold his watch in front of the mirror?
Because it was reflection time.
The girl put an alarm clock in her shoe because she didn’t want her feet to fall asleep.
I wonder why my alarm watch doesn’t work.
Perhaps it needs a hand.
Annoying Alarm Clock Puns and Jokes
Do you always get up on time? Well, if you’re like most people, the answer is no. In fact, many of us would rather sleep in than get up early. That’s why we love funny alarm clock jokes
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Your phone has already replaced your watch, camera, calendar, and alarm clock…
Don’t let it replace your family.
What did the second hand say to the hour and minute hand?
“See you around in a minute, guys.”
For his birthday, I got my son an alarm clock that swears at him instead of beeping.
He’s in for a rude awakening.
What did the wall clock do after it stopped ticking?
It just hanged around.
Apparently, my alarm clock is transparent
I slept right through it
What time would it be if an Elephant sat on the watch?
It sure would be a time to buy a new watch.
I use my cell phone as an alarm clock.
I call it Veriz’n shine..
What would a watch ask the clock?
“Hour you doing?”
To get an alarm clock to go off, you must turn it on
I operate in the same manner
Did you hear about the boy who ate his alarm clock?
Apparently, it was really time-consuming
There’s consistently time for an interesting play on words or two, particularly while you’re making tickers, watches, hours or minutes the star of your jokes.
However, while there’s a lot of giggles to be had on the subject of time it’s likewise a significant business. Did you be aware, for instance, that at the highest point of Mount Everest a year could associate with 15 microseconds more limited than a year experienced adrift level?
Have you ever known about the strontium nuclear clock? It’s tracked down in America and is the most dependable clock to have at any point been constructed. Researchers say it will be exact in something like a second for in excess of 15 billion years.