funny spider jokes

50 Fancy Venomous Spider Jokes

Certain individuals love them and disdain them, yet we can all concur that spiders can be comical!

The eight-legged unpleasant little animals make for some extraordinary joke material. Assuming you’re searching for interesting kids about insects, you’ve made the best decision by finding them on the web. Maybe you’ll take a gander at insects in another light subsequent to perusing these entertaining bug jokes and cobweb quips. If you have any desire to look into bugs and perhaps figure out where you can go to observe them, you could go on a minibeast chase around London.

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Funny Spider Jokes and Puns

You’re certain to observe more than one entertaining insect quip or bug joke on the internet. We’ve gathered probably the best insect jokes and quips here!

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What part of a computer does a spider use?
The webcam!

What part of a computer does a spider use The webcam!


What would happen if spiders were as large as horses?
If one bit you, you could ride it to the hospital!


What do you call a spider that can dance?
A jitterbug!

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Why are spiders, good swimmers?
They have webbed feet!


What did the spider say to the bug?
Pleased to eat you!

What did the spider say to the bug Pleased to eat you!


What do you call an undercover arachnid?
A spy-der!


Why did the spider buy a car?
So he could take it out for a spin!


What do you get when you cross a tarantula and a rose?
I don’t know, but I wouldn’t try smelling it!


What did the spider say when he broke his new web?
Darn it!


What’s the difference between a spider and a web designer?
A spider loves finding bugs in its web!

What's the difference between a spider and a web designer A spider loves finding bugs in its web!


What do you call a hundred spiders on a tyre?
A spinning wheel!


What did the spider say to the fly?
Pleased to eat you!


Why do spiders like living in haunted houses?
Because ghosts can’t destroy their webs!


What does a spider do when he feels sick?
He looks up his symptoms on WebMD.


What do you call the place where spiders meet?
A website!

What do you call the place where spiders meet A website!


What does Spiderman do on his day off?
He surfs the world wide web!


Where do spiders play football?
At Webley Stadium!


How tall is a spider?
8 feet!


Why did the spider kid get told off by his mum?
Because he was spending too much time on the web!


What kind of doctors is like spiders?
Spin doctors!

What kind of doctors is like spiders Spin doctors!


Why did the fly fly?
Because the spider spider!


What are spider webs good for?
Haunted houses!


What do you get when you cross a tarantula and a tiger?
I don’t know, but I don’t want to stick around to find out!


Silly Spider One-Liners

A few spiders are great guardians – wolf bug mothers convey their young on their backs until they are prepared to strike out all alone; female secret entryway bugs protect their broods inside their tunnels regularly longer than one year, and some female bouncing bugs even attendant their spiderlings with a protein-rich substance tantamount to drain.

Cobwebs can have many lines, yet these bug jokes just need one to get the zinger.

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Finding a spider at home isn’t the scary part. The scary part is when it’s gone!


I tried killing a spider with hairspray. It may still be alive, but its hair looks amazing.

I tried killing a spider with hairspray. It may still be alive, but its hair looks amazing.


I just killed a huge spider crawling along the floor with my shoe. I don’t care how big the spider is, nobody steals my shoes!


A shark, a crocodile, and a giant spider walk into a bar. Another normal day in Australia!

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A couple of my friends have opened their doors and been slapped by a loud, obnoxious spider. Looks like there’s a nasty bug going around!


A spider just got called up to the England cricket team. I’ve heard he’s a great spinner!


A spider just crawled onto my keyboard. Don’t worry, it’s under ctrl.

A spider just crawled onto my keyboard. Don't worry, it's under ctrl.


I just bought a new pair of trousers made from spider silk. They look great, but the flies keep getting stuck.


My friend asked me to tell her some great spider jokes. I told her to look them up on the web.


I saw a gigantic spider in my room earlier. I named him Cotton Eye Joe because I only wanted to know two things; where did he come from, and where did he go?


I felt so guilty after I stepped on a spider this morning. You should’ve seen him; he looked crushed.


I asked my friend if he knew what spiders ate. He didn’t know and told me to go look it up on the web.

I asked my friend if he knew what spiders ate. He didn't know and told me to go look it up on the web.


I killed a spider with a pair of flip-flops. He looked so silly; they were way too big for him!


Hilarious Spider Jokes

Bugs consume 400-800 million tons of prey, mostly bugs. People consume somewhere near 400 million tons of meat and fish every year. Insect silk is one of the most grounded normally happening materials. Bug silk is more grounded than steel, more grounded, and more stretchy than Kevlar; a pencil-thick strand of arachnid silk could be utilized to stop a Boeing 747 in flight.

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Why are spiders like tops?
Because they are always spinning!


Did you hear about the spider love triangle?
It was a tangled web!


What do you get when you cross a spider with an eyeball?
A website!


Why are spiders bad at driving?
Because they always spin out!

Why are spiders bad at driving Because they always spin out!


What do you get when you cross a spider and an ear of corn?
Cobwebs!


What does a spider do inside your ear?
It makes your head spin!


What’s a spider’s favorite hobby?
Fly fishing!


What do you call two recently married spiders?
Newly-webs!


What do spiders eat in Paris?
French flies!

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What do spiders eat in Paris French flies!


What does a spider do when he gets angry?
He goes up the wall!


How could the big tarantula find his partner online?
He spiders on the world wide web!


What’s red and dangerous?
Strawberry and tarantula jelly!

What's red and dangerous Strawberry and tarantula jelly!


Super Spider Anecdote Jokes


A young boy asked his dad for a pet spider for his birthday. The dad went to the pet shop to find out more about the creepy crawlies.
“How much do one of these costs?” he asked, pointing to the glass box full of arachnids.
“About 50 pounds,” said the pet shop clerk.
“50 pounds!” the dad said, “Never mind. I’ll just find a cheap one on the web.”


I told my teenage daughter to go get me an encyclopedia. She just laughed at me and said, “You’re so old Dad, just use my phone instead.”
So I threw her phone against the wall to kill the spider!


Summary

Tune in, we comprehend that bugs may not be the principal animal to ring a bell when somebody asks what you think about your number one creature. In any case, cut these dreadful crawlers a little leeway – they’re cool assuming that you allow them an opportunity. Additionally, they come en masse (there are 38,000 species spread across each landmass with the exception of Antarctica), so it’s likely best to get along.

One method for checking out bugs from an alternate perspective? To see the value in how darn entertaining 8-legged creatures are. Also, that’s right, we have the bug jokes and bug jokes to demonstrate these eight-leggers are a huge load of tomfoolery.

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