You have just found the absolute best selection of funny nerd jokes. I love this type of entertainment and topic; seriously. I am a Big Fan of Star Wars, Chemistry Jokes, and especially programmer jokes. And for the SEO, here are my favorite SEO Jokes. Pretty much any jokes for geeks and nerds make my day.
So I sat down and run throw a whole bunch of research process for you to bring you hilarious gags, one-liners and puns you can use and share and have a good time with.
Share with your friends and laugh out loud with our jokes of the day and our inspiring and funny quotes by famous people.
Read: Hard riddles (with answers)
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Generic Nerdy Jokes (for Dorks?)
Let us kick start this list of geek jokes for nerds with more generic ones. These dorky jokes are best enjoyed in school, at home or with friends.
Schrodinger gets pulled over by a police man. The cop is very serious, and starts to search the trunk for anything suspicious.
Police man: “Do you know there’s a dead cat in here?”
Schrodinger: “Well, I do now!”
When I was in school, my teacher looked at me.
Teacher: “Name two pronouns!”
Me: “Who, me?”
The Romans never found Algebra very hard. The X was always a 10.
Knock Knock.
Who is there?
To?
To Who?
No, to whom!
Rubeus Hagrid: “You are a unit of power, Harry Potter!”
Harry Potter: “I am Watt?”
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Infinitely many mathematicians walk into a bar. The first says, “I’ll have a beer.” The second says, “I’ll have half a beer.” The third says, “I’ll have a quarter of a beer.” The barman pulls out just two beers.
The mathematicians are all like: “That’s all you’re giving us? How drunk do you expect us to get on that?”
The bartender: “Come on guys. Know your limits.”
Nerdy Puns and One-Liners
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I’m reading a book on Anti-Gravity. I can’t put it down.
I have a new theory on Inertia.
But it doesn’t seem to be going anywhere.
My pin is the last 4 digits of π.
Why doesn’t anybody talk to circles?
Because there’s no point.
Where Does Bad Light End Up?
In prism.
What’s a swimmer’s favorite kind of math?
Dive-ision!
What does the ice cube say to the water glass?
I was water before it got cool.
If you ever get cold, just stand in the corner. They usually have 90 degrees.
May the Mass Times Acceleration be with you!
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I had an argument with a 90° angle. It turns out it was right.
The past, present, and future walked into a bar. It was tense.
Nerdy Jokes in Science
What does the ice cube say to the water glass?
I was water before it got cool.
I love how the earth rotates…it really makes my day.
Have you heard about the sick chemist?
If you can not helium, and you can not curium, you will probably have to barium.
The universe is made of Protons, Neutrons, Electrons and Morons.
There are two types people in the world.
Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data.
Why can’t you trust atoms?
They make up everything.
My physics teacher told me I had not potential. Then he pushed me off the building.
Nerdy Jokes for Developer/ Programmer
All right, you have made it this far, so you deserve some funny nerdy computer jokes.
There are two types people in the world.
Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data.
Why did the programmer quit his job?
Because he didn’t get arrays.
Renewable Energy?
I am a big Fan!
There are 10 kinds of people in this world.
Those who understand binary and those who don’t.
Did you know there’s a Band called 1023MB?
They are really good, yet they haven’t had any gigs yet.
Why did the programmer use the entire bottle of shampoo during one shower?
Because the bottle said “Lather, Rinse, Repeat.”
The wife send her engineer husband to the supermarket:
Wife: “Could you please buy one milk. And if they have eggs, get six!”
The husband comes back with six cartons of milk.
…better close the functions properly…
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Why did the programmer cross the road?
To git on the other side.
Source: Nerd Jokes from Reddit
Nerdy Jokes from Movies (Star Wars, Star Trek, Back to the Future, Big Bang Theory)
Nerdy Star Wars Jokes
May the Mass Times Acceleration be with you!
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Which Star Wars Character works at a Restaurant?
Darth Waiter.
What car does Yoda drive?
To-Yoda.
Read more: Master Yoda Quotes
Is BB Hungry?
No, BB-8
What did the Jedi say to the sheep?
May the Force Be With Ewe.
Why didn’t Luke Skywalker cross the road?
Because he’d get a ticket for skywalking.
How does Chewbaca open a PDF File?
With Adobe Wan Kenobi.
Nerdy Star Trek Jokes
A young man was applying to join Starfleet.
Recruiting officer: “Where were you born?”
Young man: “Earth, sir.”
Recruiting officer: “What part?”
Young man: “All of me, sir.”
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Where does a 10-foot Mugato sleep?
Anywhere he wants to.
McCoy: “Should we have a friendly game of cards?”
Kirk: “No, let’s play poker.”
How do you stop from falling out of a Bird of Prey?
You just have to Klingon.
What is the least popular show on Bajor?
Keeping up with the Cardassians!
Source: startrek.com
McCoy: “I’ve borrowed Mr. Scott’s bagpipes.”
Kirk: “But you can’t play them.”
McCoy: “While I’ve got them, neither can he!”
McCoy: “Do you serve crabs here?”
Mess officer: “We serve anybody. Sit down.”
Nerdy Back to The Future Jokes
If I had a Delorean, I would probably only drive it from time to time.
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Back To The Future: Has a time machine, but always in a hurry.
I can’t wait to see Back to the Future 4. It was so good.
Whatever you do, Marty, never go back to 2020.
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Nerdy Big Bang Theory Jokes
A neutron walks into a bar and asks how much for a drink.
The Bartender replies: “For you, no charge!”
“Obviously you’re not well suited for three-dimensional chess, perhaps three-dimensional candyland would be more your speed. It must be humbling to suck on so many different levels.” – Sheldon
Laugh more here: Funny Chess Jokes
A poultry farmer was distressed because his chickens stopped laying eggs.
He didn’t know what to do about it, but one of his friends, a physicist, offered to help. The physicist came out to the farm, took a bunch of measurements, and went back home to analyze the data.
The physicist called the farmer on the phone and said: “Okay, I have a solution for your problem, but it only works with spherical chickens in a vacuum.”
– Leonard
“Why did the chicken cross the mobius strip? To get to the same side. BAZINGA”
– Sheldon
“If he were any bigger, he’d have moons orbiting him.”
– Leonard
You are a 10? Maybe on the PH scale, because you are basic.
Love is in the Air? Wrong. Nitrogen, Oxygen and Carbon Dioxide are in the Air.
“Well, there’s always the possibility that a trash can spontaneously formed around the letter, but Occam’s Razor would suggest that someone threw it out.” – Sheldon
Nerdy Math Jokes
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Three statisticians go out hunting together. After a while they spot a solitary rabbit. The first statistician takes aim and overshoots. The second aims and undershoots.
The third shouts out “We got him!”
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A physicist, a biologist, and a mathematician are sitting on a bench across from a house. They watch as two people go into the house, and then a little later, three people walk out.
The physicist says, “The initial measurement was incorrect.”
Why couldn’t the angle get a loan?
Its parents wouldn’t cosine.
Why do plants hate math?
Because it gives them square roots.
What did one math book say to the other?
Don’t bother me. I’ve got my own problems!
How many mathematicians does it take to change a light bulb?
One. She gives it to three physicists, thus reducing it to a problem that has already been solved.
FAQ
What is a Nerd?
A nerd is considered a foolish or contemptible person who lacks social skills or is boringly studious. Yet, a nerd is also usually considered highly intelligent and has a lot of knowledge on several topics.
What is a Geek?
The word geek is a slang term originally used to describe eccentric or non-mainstream people; in current use, the word typically connotes an expert or enthusiast obsessed with a hobby or intellectual pursuit, with a general pejorative meaning of a “peculiar person, especially one who is perceived to be overly intellectual, unfashionable, boring, or socially awkward”.
Source: Wikipedia
What is a Dork?
A dork is considered an odd, socially awkward, unstylish person.
Why 42 nerdy Jokes?
The number 42 is, in The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy by Douglas Adams, the “Answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything“, calculated by an enormous supercomputer named Deep Thought over a period of 7.5 million years.
- Divisors: 1, 2, 3, 6, 7, 14, 21, 42
- Factorization: 2 × 3 × 7
- Octal: 528
Summary of Jokes for Nerds
The real nerd has noticed, I added more than 42 jokes. There is just so many fantastic puns and gags for nerds, I simply could not stop. In fact, this article is still in motion. And as you know: An object in motion, stays in motion.
I wrote up even more jokes and gags and one-liners for you:
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