Yes yes, some jokes never get old, but hopefully these lockdown jokes will eventually. While we are all in this together, I think it is a good idea to sprinkle in some sense of humor. We are so deep in, we have to have a good laugh by now just ot keep going.
Therefore, I wrote up a bunch of funny lockdown jokes that for sure will make you giggle, laugh and brighten your day.
I also added my favorite videos to watch for passing the time a bit better. At the end of the article, I also added fantastic motivational quotes that you want to read. No doubt, you will love them. I tried to stay away from the cheesy ones, I promise.
Wanna share these jokes? Please add a link to this article. This way you help us and your friends can find even more puns with us.
And since you are at home, take on the challenge of these best travel trivia questions.
We share with you:
Funny Lockdown Jokes
My husband got us a world map and gave me a dart.
He: “Throw this and wherever it lands – that’s where I’m taking you when this lockdown and pandemic ends.”
Turns out, we will be spending two weeks behind the fridge.
A man walks into a bar…
wait…
no, he doesn’t. It is lockdown.
Me before Covid-19: There is no way school can be any more boring…
Me during lockdown: Be careful what you wish for…
In the beginning of this pandemic and lockdown, I always used sanitizer. By now, I am more leaning towards drinking the alcohol myself.
I am trying to do some fruit smoothies, but they keep coming out as Margaritas.
Great…I used all this lockdown time to learn 7 new languages, and by the time I would be able to travel to these countries, for sure I will forgotten all of it again.
Lockdown can only go 4 ways. You will come out
- a munk
- a hunk
- a chunk or
- a drunk.
Chose wisely.
My body has absorbed so much soap, sanitizer and disinfectant, that every time I pee, I basically clean the toilet.
Laugh more with our Hilarious Cleaning Jokes
With all these alcoholic sanitizer, my hands are the most drunken part of my body.
Why did the pirates have to go into lockdown?
Because the Arrrrrrrr! rate had risen.
Read: hilarious pirate jokes for kids
Some are learning languages, some are doing couch to 5k but me?I am planning on growing my eyebrows out for the whole lockdown, and seeing what I have to play with at the end of it..
(Source: LydiaEmilien)
What should you do if you don’t understand a coronavirus joke?
Be patient!
Covid-19? More like Covid-20, Covid-21…I sincerely hope this is where it stops.
School during lockdown.
Sister: That stupid teacher does not know anything. No math, no history, no science. And I am sure, I smelled Vodka on her breath, cheap Vodak.
Brother: Stop it, Sis. Mom is trying her best.
Big plans planned for tonight. I will probably hit the living room around 8ish.
It is almost impressive how some friends can be even late for a zoom-call.
Me in March 2020: Oh well, at least now I was part of a major historic event.
Me in March 2021: Okay, no more historic events please.
Lockdown?
I am just happy to have an excuse to not meet people anymore.
I summed up the funniest boss jokes here.
Okay, Covid-19. I am at this stage where I usually restart the game or throw out the Playstation.
How does Beyoncé get through lockdown?
By social distan-sing.
Lockdown? More like locked-in.
Due to my isolation I finished 3 books yesterday. And believe me, that was a lot of coloring.
Home is where you don’t need to wear a bra.
All moms during lockdown:
I do not know what the economy will look like after the pandemic and lockdown, but I do know that 2.5 millions bookings flights to deserted islands all at once won’t hurt it.
(source: instagram.com/paigekellerman_writer)
Me before Covid-19: I wish I could work from home like all these instagrammers and digital nomads…
Me during lockdown: Okay, this not what I meant…
Which Christmas film was 30 years ahead of its time?
Home Alone
(source: Guardian)
Why did Mary and Joseph not make it to Bethlehem?
All Virgin flights were cancelled.
The World Health Organization announced that dogs cannot contract Corona Virus. Dogs held in quarantine can now be released. So there you have finally the answer to:
WHO let the dogs out!
I will tell you a Covid-19 joke, but we will have to wait around two weeks to see if you got it!
Sometimes I am wondering if this is all happening, because I didn’t forward that stupid email to 10 more people.
If there’s a baby boom nine months from now, what will happen in 2033?
There will be a whole bunch of quaran-teens!
Read: the most hilarious teen jokes of all time
Most useless items in 2020 and 2021:
- Passport
- Travel journal
- Calendar
- Pants
- Condoms
Whole bunch of people about to learn that “sufficient time home alone” was not the only thing they needed to write a great novel.
Turns out I do not lack time, I lack motivation…WHO knew…
If you would like to know how it feels to be in hospitality during this Corona-Virus Pandemic?
Remember when the Titantic was sinking and the band continued to play? Well, we are the band.
(source: ThePantils in Tunbridge)
By that amount of toilet paper people stored, I sincerely doubt that there will be a baby boom in 9 months…. but P*ornhub, well…
Read: 69 seriously dirty jokes for adults
At this point of lockdown I am convinced my autobiography ill most be a collection of emails where my implied tone was misconstrued.
(source: instagram.com/paigekellerman_writer)
Why are Santa’s reindeer allowed to travel on Christmas Eve?
They have herd immunity.
Read: Funny Christmas jokes and puns – not just covid-related.
This year I did not travel to the Maldives due to the Pandemic…usually I do not go because I am broke.
Find all my favorite travel puns and jokes here.
Hilarious Lockdown Videos
One of my absolute favorite lock down videos is this one: Choose your quarantine character, Tik Tok compilation.
Basically it is tiktokkers at home showcasing different character options like in a video game. It is a bit like Tony Hawk, for instance. The video is quite short. If you are a gamer, you will for sure love this one.
Funny Work From Home Fails During Coronavirus Quarantine Lockdown
This.Is.Hilarious! If you are one of the many people now working from home, you have to watch this. In a way, I hope these things do not happen to you. But, please, if they happen, record it and share it 😉
Bored in Quarantine? Watch funny Coronavirus Videos
Random Collection of Funny Clips to pass time at home, besides Netflix. Common hashtags to find these types of videos are #Covid-19 #quarantimekiller #covidiots #covidfun #coronajokes
Motivational Quotes for Lockdown
Sure, one way to take this situation is by having a good laugh with these funny lockdown jokes. But, I want to finish this article with a couple of motivational quotes.
This is not forever.
If you’re going through hell, keep going.
― Winston Churchill
Spread love, not the virus!
This is the sign you have been loo
king for.
Keep your head up, always!
It is ok to be sad. It is also ok to be frustrated. But, it is not okay to stay this way. Keep going!
Be proud of how hard you are working.
“Every flower must grow through dirt”
― Laurie Jean Sennott
Difficult roads lead to beautiful destinations.
And finally:
You will be okay…you have no choice!
Wrap up the Gags and Humor for Lockdown
Usually I ask my readers if they are still here…but you know, since you are sitting at home, for sure you are.
I sincerely hoped these gags put one or several smile on your face. Feel free to share them, share the love and good vibes. If you use these jokes, please add a link to this article and mention us. This way your friends can find it too and you make me happy too. I promise you, in return I will keep writing more one-liners lockdown jokes and more.
Do you have your own gags for and during Coronavirus, Lockdown or Quarantine? Then do not be shy and type away. We would love to read it!
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