BEST Kitchen Jokes That Foodies Will Find Amusing!

43 BEST Kitchen Jokes That Foodies Will Find Amusing!

Is the kitchen also your favorite place in the house? Cooking has a way of bringing people together and so are the jokes! You can never go wrong if you combine these two. So, while cooking your delicious recipe, laugh out loud with our hilarious kitchen jokes. 

If you are an absolute foodie, we have more jokes for you. Have a look at some of the jokes and quotes we have compiled for you. 

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Funny Kitchen Jokes

One of our unforgettable memories took place in the kitchen. This place is like a holy place to all these amazing chefs and foodies out there. Who can’t blame them? We know, we won’t. Let’s enjoy these funny jokes about the kitchen while indulging in your favorite meal!

Laugh more: Funny Pantry Jokes

What do Santa’s elves cook within the kitchen?
A u-tinsel.

Read more: FUNNY Christmas Jokes To Keep You Laughing All Season

What do Santa’s elves cook within the kitchen

One of my kitchen utensils seems to be playing classical music.
Think it’s the Chopin board.

When I was a student, I was worried that my housemates would be annoyed if I ran off with some of their kitchen equipment.
But that was a whisk I was willing to take.

I have a device in my kitchen which makes smoothies that make me think heaven is a place on earth.
Blender Carlisle.

I saw a yogurt floating across my kitchen.
I think it might be paranormal activia.

Opened the kitchen cupboard and found some fake noodles.
It’s an impasta.

I fell asleep beside the kitchen sink.
I feel completely drained now.

I got a Lord of the Rings themed kitchen.
I particularly like the hob bit.

I was going to put my slices of meat on the top shelf of the fridge but the steaks were too high.

I was going to put my slices of meat on the top shelf of the fridge but the steaks were too high

A friend of mine used to install kitchen work surfaces but he was arrested for counter fitting.

Had to give up on my plan to set up a business making work surfaces for kitchens.
It was counterproductive.

How do you know when a blonde has been making chocolate chip cookies?
You find M&M shells all over the kitchen floor.

Stunt drivers and happy chefs have one thing in common.
They live making do-(ugh)nuts!

A Chinese man visits the doctor.
His hands are covered in severe burns from a cooking accident.
The man says, “I know it’s bad, doctor, but how bad is it?”
The doctor replies, “I’m afraid you’ll never wok again.”

Kitchen Jokes One Liners

Eat slowly to avoid choking on your food because these hilarious kitchen one-liners are so funny, you might not be able to control it! Check out our compilation of funny one-liners and have a giggle!

In a 3600-year-old cooking pot, you can only find Ancient Greece!

In a 3600-year-old cooking pot, you can only find Ancient Greece

Everyone should always cook egg dishes to egg-spand their horizon!

Laugh more: best jokes about eggs

The favorite spice ingredient of any historian is anchovy!

If you’re making good prawn dishes, you’ll need a good apron.

The only classical music maestro who can prepare good dishes in a TV program is Show Pan.

While cooking, I got stressed and screamed at my colander, and now I have a strained voice!

A religious chef is a man of the broth!

A favorite gun for any chef is a-salt-rifle!

A lawyer who cooks lunch can be called a sue chef!

Thyme flies when you have a long cooking day!

Thyme flies when you have a long cooking day

Kitchen Sink Jokes

This compilation is not so popular and you won’t hear them that much. We hope you will find these kitchen sink jokes funny enough to tell your friends. Enjoy!

Why don’t Satanic boats ever sink?
Because they’re Unholy

“It’s sink or swim.” As my dad always said.
Lovely man, terrible lifeguard.

Laugh more: Best Dad Jokes

My grandpa warned people the Titanic would sink…
No one listened, but he kept warning them until they got sick of him and kicked him out of the cinema.

What should you do if there’s a sink knocking on your door?
Let that sink in.

Did you hear about the guy who lit a fire in his canoe and caused it to sink?
It just goes to show, you can’t have your kayak and heat it too!

Why do ships and boats sink all the time?
Because they don’t know how to swim.

Why do ships and boats sink all the time

My husband tried to tell everyone that would listen that the Titanic would sink…
They finally kicked him out of the theater.

I had to unclog my sink today.
I found it to be very draining.

You can tell the gender of an ant by putting it on top of water.
If it sinks, it’s a girl ant. If it doesn’t, buoyant.

Bad Cooking Jokes

It won’t be complete if we didn’t serve you some bad cooking jokes. But don’t worry, we promise that these jokes are not so terrible you can still finish your food. 

I keep having bad dreams about an ancient Egyptian mummy attacking me while I’m cooking. I call them my…
Rameses kitchen nightmares.

My wife’s cooking is so bad
We usually pray after our food.

My wife's cooking is so bad

I’m glad my mom is such a bad cook
If my date can eat her meatloaf with a smile, I know they’ll swallow anything.

I’m not saying I’m a bad cook.
But how long does pasta stay in the toaster?

Saying Grace…
My wife’s cooking is so bad we pray after the meal.

Why do lesbians make bad cooks?
They always eat out.

My husband asked me if I could clear the kitchen table.
I had to get a running start but I made it

Dirty Kitchen Jokes (NOT For Kids)

Spice things up with our kitchen humor!

Did you know that it’s a waste lighting up a bbq pit for a small sausage?
That’s what Jim’s wife told him last night.

What do you call a pumpkin who spits his seeds everywhere?
A jerk o’ lantern!

Baby, don’t miss my BBQ because you’ll love my meet in your mouth.

Baby, don’t miss my BBQ because you’ll love my meet in your mouth


There you have it, our fresh from the oven jokes just for you! We hope you don’t have any funny kitchen accidents while reading our amusing jokes. 

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I am Jimmy, clown at heart. I love silly, funny, nerdy, quirky jokes. So I thought I should start a website about jokes. Why a carrot as a logo? Why not! Here, have a carrot!