77 FUNNY Chicago Jokes for an Extra Windy Day

77 FUNNY Chicago Jokes for an Extra Windy Day

Are you from Chicago? Or are you planning for a trip to Chicago? If you’re looking for some best lines, funny puns, and captions for your travel, this site will do the job for you.

Everyone knows that Chicago has an odd attitude. From its cold winters and windy city up to its great architectural innovations and natural history, Chicago offers a variety of a feel-good vibe we all wanted.

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Of course, we also have the best New York City jokes. And since we are at it, here are my favorite New York City Songs.

Poke some little fun and browse these funny Chicago jokes we put together to have a good laugh!

Laugh more with our Short and Funny Jokes that sting.

Funny Chicago Jokes

Yes, start scrolling if you love making fun of Chicago. Let your trip be more enjoyable by sharing these dangerously funny lines. You may find some original jokes nobody from Chicago knows. But who knows?


They won’t be serving beer for the rest of the year at Chicago Cubs baseball games.
They lost the opener.

They won't be serving beer for the rest of the year at Chicago Cubs baseball games


The city of Chicago is no longer giving speeding tickets.
Instead, to deter speeders, they are giving away Cubs tickets.


Did you hear about the kidnapping in Chicago yesterday?
Oh don’t worry, he woke up


I have a friend who worked in Chicago his entire life tell me it isn’t that violent…
He is a tail gunner on a school bus.


I just ordered a Chicago style pizza.
It started shooting as soon I opened the box.

Read more: Eggcellent Food Jokes and Puns that will Crack you Up


What do you call two Mexicans fighting in Chicago?
Juan on juan


One time I was alone and got lost in downtown Chicago, and got jumped by four black guys.
They were really nice, the car started right up, and they even gave me directions back to the interstate.


Which city has a lottery with a prize of free gigolo services?
Chicago. It’s known as the Win D City.

Which city has a lottery with a prize of free gigolo services


What’s the difference between a Chicago Bears fan and Marty McFly?
Eventually, Marty McFly stopped going back to 1985.


Why can’t a man living in New York be buried in Chicago?
Because he’s still alive.


San Francisco, Manhattan, Chicago, and Miami were having a lively conversation until St. Louis passed by, looking depressed.
Chicago said, “why are you so sad?”
St. Louis replied, “I’m always in the state of Missouri.”


Jussie Smollett had to pay 10,000 to Chicago and do community service to get his charges dropped…
I hope he isn’t beating himself up over this.


Why does a Chicago-style hot dog always lose races?
Because it refuses to ketchup.


I went to a beer festival. In order to prevent myself from getting too drunk, I decided to follow the Chicago Bears’ offensive game plan.
Three and out.


Apparently, an unidentified group of protesters broke into the Chicago police station and stole all the toilet seats…
The police are looking for suspects, but for now, they have nothing to go on.


I hear that in Chicago there’s a lot of mist but in Salt Lake City.
Bigamist.

I hear that in Chicago there's a lot of mist but in Salt Lake City


What do you call a loud person from Chicago?
Illinoisey.


Why did the police show up at a party in Chicago?
They received an Illinoise complaint.


What does Disney have in common with a guy in an outhouse in Chicago?
They’re both making frozen number two.

Laugh more: Disney Jokes That are Truly Magical!


Apparently, someone in Chicago gets stabbed every 52 seconds..
poor guy.


Chicago style pizza changes you.
I use to like New York style pizza.
Till I tasted Chicago style pizza.
Now, I love New York style pizza.


You know why you should never hang out with that guy from Chicago?
Illinois you.

You know why you should never hang out with that guy from Chicago


What state is Chicago in?
ILL.


What’s your favorite game as a resident of Chicago?
Mine is “Gunshots Or Fireworks?”


They’re dying the Chicago River blue in honor of the Cubs win…
It’s the first time it will be blue since the French got there.


How many Chicago Policemen does it take to crack an egg?
None. It fell down the stairs.


An ISIS attack wouldn’t do any damage to Chicago
What’s one more pothole?


If I had a dollar for every mugging in S Chicago…
I’d still have nothing.


What’s the most assigned elementary school essay in Chicago?
“What I want to be *IF* I grow up”

What's the most assigned elementary school essay in Chicago


I’m glad the Chicago Cubs finally won the World Series.
108 years of hibernation just doesn’t seem healthy.


To the Chicago Cubs.
Thanks, you’ve doomed us all.


Chicago wins World Series for first time since 1908
In other news, Chicago burns to ground for first time since 1871.


Chicago really is the windy city.
After all, they did just win de World Series.


Chicago Dad Jokes

Dads are ultimate jokers who can just joke around and make everything light. Do you wanna be that kind of dad? Worry not. We will bring out the best Chicago dad joker in you. Be funny enough to tell these jokes anyway!

Laugh more: Best Dad Jokes


What’s the difference between green bay and Chicago?
In Chicago, Moosehead is a type of beer and in green bay, it’s a felony.


I’m not worried about the Chicago Bears.
I’m sure they will bounce back.

I’m not worried about the Chicago Bears


It was so quiet in Chicago during the last inning.
You could hear the gunshots.


Ever since I moved away from downtown Chicago…
…I really feel like I’m out of the Loop.


On my visit to Chicago, the weather forecast said it was muggy.
The forecaster was right. I went outside and someone stole my shoes.


If you came down with an irritating sickness in Chicago…
Then you’d be ill and annoyed.


Today’s performance of Hamilton in Chicago was cancelled due to the cold.
Once again, Brrr killed Hamilton.


Ok Chicago, please be responsible. If the game doesn’t go your way tonight…
At least act like you’ve been there before.

Ok Chicago, please be responsible. If the game doesn't go your way tonight


Rumor has it that distraught Chicago Bear’s field goal kicker Cody Parker tried to end his life recently.
The bullet went wide right.


I had a bad trip on LSD.
Chicago traffic is really slow along the lake.

Chicago Puns for Instagram

Here are some Chicago captions that will lighten up your Instagram vibe. Your Chicagoan followers will get the humor right away, we promise! These Chicago Instagram captions are for free.


A trip to Chicago is an L-evated experience.


Blown away by the Windy City!


The best views in Chicago are at Navy Peer.


Finally made it to Chicago.
It’s a boat time!

Finally made it to Chicago


In Chicago, I’m in the Loop.


Slice, Slice baby!


Taking cheesy selfies in Chicago.


Make sure to relish the good times in Chicago.


Having a Fields day.


Dogs love Chicago because they get to visit Wiggly Field.


Chicago Bean Captions for Instagram

We will spill some funny bean jokes for you. Use these lines about Chicago beans and upgrade a brand of humor to your followers. These are funny enough to make people laugh.


I’ve never bean to Chicago before.


Chicago, where have you bean all my life.

Chicago, where have you bean all my life


You haven’t bean to Chicago unless you’ve bean here.


Chicago’s frozen bean.


I bean thinkin’ about you.


Chicago: Bean there, done that.


Cool beans.


Funny Chicago Quotes and Chicago One Liners

Here are some favorite quotes and Chicago phrases that are downright funny. Share these while walking down the streets of Chicago or while getting lost in the windy city. These will surely get you through the day.


I love Chicago, but I’m ready to get the L out of here.

I love Chicago, but I’m ready to get the L out of here.


Chicago floats my boat.


What you talkin ’bout Willis Tower?


Let minnow if you want to spend the day at Lake Michigan!

Let minnow if you want to spend the day at Lake Michigan!


Lake Michigan Puns

These puns about lakes are quite funny! Get ready and have a scroll to our Lake Michigan puns.


A day at Lake Michigan buoys my spirits!


Lake Michigan is pretty Great.


Chicago, I lake you a lot!


Lake hair, don’t care.


Knock Knock Jokes about Chicago

We got you some hilarious knock-knock lines you can poke while you are in the busy city of blues and business. With the right words to tell, you will surely be the man of humor everyone would love to be with. But sometimes, the setup just does the punchlines.

Read more: Funny Knock Knock Jokes to Make You Laugh


Knock Knock.
Who’s there?
Tess me.
Tess me who?
Tess me the football team!


Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Hanna.
Hanna who?
Hanna ball off to me, Mitch!


Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Howey.
Howey who?
Howey run so fast?

Howey run so fast


Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Hans.
Hans who?
Hans to the face is a penalty.


Knock, knock.
Who’s there?
Uriah.
Uriah who?
Keep Uriah on the ball Anthony Miller!


Chicago Memes

It’s easy to find memes on the internet nowadays. But to save you the trouble of looking for the best Chicago memes, we did the job for you. Errr, these memes will do the job for you, I must say.


So you’re telling me,
there’s a pink line?

So you're telling me, there's a pink line?


Naperville kids be like…
MY LIFE SUCKS!

naperville kids be like


Des Plaines, IL…
Responsible for America’s obesity

Responsible for America's obesity


Summary 

Having a sense of humor better than anyone else is kinda great. That is why we always got your back with our loaded puns, jokes, and memes for anyone’s bad day. You’re free to even copy and paste these lines for your Instagram captions however you want!

Well, we have many more.

Jimmy
I am Jimmy, clown at heart. I love silly, funny, nerdy, quirky jokes. So I thought I should start a website about jokes. Why a carrot as a logo? Why not! Here, have a carrot!