Are you always excited for the summer? One of the activities that we are looking forward every summer is going to the beach. People of all ages love it there – kids can play and build sand castles and adults can go surfing or just relax under the sun while reading a book.
We know that it is now always easy to go to beaches, so you might want to check out our beach jokes so your kid will stop nudging you on the way there.
You should also check out our summer quotes and captions for your Instagram posts.
Funny Beach Jokes for Kids
Beaches can make us happy! It is because of the Vitamin D that we are getting while we soak our bodies under the sun. It produces certain chemicals in our brains that make us feel good! These jokes about the beach will totally leave your kids rolling on the floor.
What is a shark’s favorite sandwich?
Peanut butter and jellyfish!
What would you find on a haunted beach?
What do you call seagulls that live near the bay?
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What do you pay to spend a day on the beach?
Why should you never blame a dolphin for doing anything wrong?
Because they never do it on porpoise!
How do we know that the ocean is friendly?
What did one tide pool say to the other tide pool?
Show me your mussels.
What do you get when you combine an elephant with a fish?
What’s the most common insect found on the beach?
A beach buggy!
Who cleans the ocean?
Why is the beach always so confident?
It’s 100% shore.
Why didn’t the poodle want to go to the beach?
It didn’t want to be a hot dog.
What do you call a cat who lives at the beach?
Where do sharks go on vacation?
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How do you make an octopus laugh?
What do turtles, eggs, and beaches all have?
What do sea monsters eat?
Fish and ships!
What does a mermaid use to call her friends?
A shell phone, of course.
What do you call a lazy crayfish?
What kind of music do killer whales like?
They listen to the orca-stra!
Why is the sand under the dock so resistant?
It doesn’t give into pier pressure.
Where do sheep go on vacation?
What happens when you throw a green rock into the Red Sea?
It gets wet.
Why don’t oysters share their pearls?
Because they’re shellfish!
Funny Scuba Diving Jokes and Scuba Diver Jokes
Have you tried scuba diving? This exciting and mind blowing underwater experience is worth a try if you are an adventurous fellow. Actually, even if you are not. This is the best thing that you can do if you want to explore the beauty of underwater. As you think about it, have a scroll to our collection of jokes about scuba diving.
I hate scuba diving.
It was the lowest moment of my life.
Is the pool safe for diving?
It deep ends.
Why can’t Bill Clinton go scuba diving?
He won’t inhale.
What are your thoughts on diving?
Well, I guess it’s descent as a hobby.
My friend was telling me about how a shark attacked her while she was diving.
I told her, that bites.
My life-long rival just beat my record for deep-sea diving.
This is a new low.
I went deep sea diving and a mollusk wanted to give me a hug!
I had a girlfriend that went scuba diving…
One day I lobster and never flounder again.
What do you call a diving dog?
A sub woofer.
I used to have a scuba diving business…
But it went under.
I applied for a job as an Instructor at a Scuba Diving center.
The interviewer wanted to know if I can work well under pressure.
Still looking for more beach related jokes? Another set of funny jokes that will make you laugh so hard. These seaside jokes can be shared to your kids while you travel to the beach.
When is a river not a river?
When it passes the beach and turns into the ocean!
What did the bread do at the beach?
It loafed around!
What is black and white and red all over?
A zebra with sunburn!
What holds the sun up in the sky?
Why do ice creams always carry an umbrella?
In case there’s a chance of sprinkles!
What did the fisherman say when his fishing line got tangled?
Something piers to be wrong!
What does Cinderella wear at the beach?
What do you call a dog on the beach?
A hot dog!
Who hangs at the beach at halloween?
Why did the spaniel not want to go to the beach?
It didn’t want to be a hot dog!
Why did the police come to the beach?
Because there was a crime wave.
Why do people like to go in salt water?
Because pepper water would make us sneeze.
What did the beach say when the tide came in?
Nothing it just waved!
What do snowmen do at the beach?
What did the sheep wear to the beach?
What kind of fruit grows at the beach?
Crab apple trees.
What did the pig say at the beach?
Why did the ice cream van break down?
Because there was a rocky road!
What’s the best day to go to the beach?
What fish is the most famous at the beach?
A star fish!
What does a bee do when it is hot?
He takes off his yellow jacket!
What does one tidal pool say to the other tidal pool?
Show me your mussels!
What did the boy say after a long day at the beach?
Mum, I’m surf bored!
What do frogs like to drink at the beach?
Why did the dog stay in the shade?
It did not want to be a hot dog!
What did the umbrella say to the beach blanket?
I’ve got you covered!
What do you get when you throw an oven into the ocean?
A heat wave!
What do you call a penguin at the beach?
Why did the crab cross the beach?
To get to the other tide!
What did the sand say when the tide came back in?
Long time no sea!
What does a mermaid use to call her friends?
A shell phone!
What kind of fish envies the starfish?
What do you call a snowman on the beach?
What is the best kind of sandwich for the beach?
Peanut butter and jellyfish!
Why didn’t the sun go to university?
Because he already had about a million degrees!
What fish is the most expensive to buy?
What fish sings?
What did the tree wear to the beach?
Beach Pick Up Lines
Watching the sunset at the beach is so romantic, right? I bet all girls won’t get tired of this. Aside from that, girls also want some humour from you and that’s for sure. So, have a look at beach pick up lines for more laughs.
Do you have a sunburn, or are you always this hot?
Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I swim by again?
The waves won’t be the only thing you’ll be riding today.
You look like you could use some help rubbing in that tanning oil.
Your eyes are like a sunset, they’re beautiful, inspiring, and hard to turn away from.
I don’t know which is prettier today, the water, the sky or your eyes.
If I build a sandcastle will you be my queen?
I’d swim across the ocean just to see you smile.
I must be lost… because I see paradise.
If someone throws sharks in the water, I’ll save you first.
I’m not a very good swimmer, do you have any lifeguard experience?
Giggle some more with our hilarious sea jokes just for you! We know you want it. Dive in to our collection and go share this to your friends as you plan along your trip to the beach.
What did the pirates take to stay healthy?
What did the mermaid get on their test?
A sea minus!
Why don’t oysters like to share their pearls?
Because they are too shellfish!
What do you call a man with a seagull on his head?
Sand Jokes and Puns
I bet all of us tried to make some sand castle when we were kids! Why don’t you reminisce all of this great memories and create a new one for your kids as you build sand castles with them? That would be so much fun! Don’t forget to pack your tools and some of our sand jokes!
Sanday is the most suitable day to have a beach picnic.
The sand witch was terrorizing all the beach tourists at lunch on Halloween.
The most famous musical movie that you will get to watch in the Sand Kingdom is ‘La La Sand”.
The oyster was telling the ocean about his sand friend:
“I love his undersand his passion for life, it’s great!”
Sand grains should stay wary of crabs.
They can easily bite their sands off.
A grain of sand was standing in the department store looking for new buckets when his friend asked him,
“Why are you just awkwardly sanding there?”
Elite sand grains only buy sand new cars.
The beach was so good at his job that he could even do it with his sands tied behind his back.
The sea and the sand weren’t close friends.
So whenever the sand asked the sea for something, he did nothing but wave.
When the sand caught the ocean frolicking aimlessly, it asked, “Water you doing?”
I’ve heard that sandpaper competitions can get challenging and rough.
I was planning on sending an email to the beach committee about their stringent timings, but I forgot to hit sand.
The seashell was having a bad day, so the sun told him, “Sleep off today.
Tomorrow you can start fresh because it’s going to be a sand new day”.
The ship captain could see in the distance that their vessel would most likely hit a sandy shore.
So he called out to his crewman, “Watch the stern! I need all sands on deck right now”.
One sand didn’t want to be roommates with the other sand.
So, he made a plan that would sand him packing.
The only way to pay for a sandcastle is with the use of sand dollars.
The crab told the sand who worked as a night watch guard to seas the night.
The sand told the gravel, “I am fine!” when he asked him how he was.
In most countries, beach bodies are buried in the sand with their hands and fingers intact.
On the other hand, in Mexico, they only burritos.
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The football coach told the kinetic sand, “You’re a good player, but I don’t think you’re fulfilling your potential”.
I told my best friend a joke about quicksand yesterday, and he finally got it today.
It took a while for the joke to sink in.
I’m really sad that I lost my prized collection of sand specimens.
They held a lot of sandimental value for me.
Diving Jokes One Liners
Another set of hilarious jokes that we have collected for good laughs. Get some inspiration to explore the underwater with our diving jokes! Diving is such a fun activity that you should totally try with friends and families.
I wish I could be your PADI card so we could always go diving together.
My dive watch is broken, can I have a little of your time?
I have a dive knife, but what I really need is a spoon.
You can always count on the divemaster to make sure you’re turned on.
Funny Shovel Jokes
Really? You are still here? Since it looks like you still want more, you can check out our funny shovel jokes! Have fun and don’t stop digging!
My family is like a treasure…
You need a map and shovel to find them.
What did the guy exclaim after inventing the shovel?
It is ground breaking!
What do you call a man with a shovel on his head?
What did scientists call the shovel when it was first created?
A ground-breaking discovery.
The shovel was a groundbreaking invention.
But everyone was blown away by the leaf blower.
I saw this odd guy walking towards the cemetery with a shovel…
I had grave concerns.
Beach One Liners
Time for a shell-ebration!
This is getting out of sand!
Oh buoy, the water is cold!
I’m shore we’ll need sun cream at the beach!
Go with the float!
Fishing you a happy summer!
Beach you to it!
Getting some vitamin sea!
Water you prefer, the beach or the pool?
Remember, don’t give in to pier pressure!
I’m ready to make waves today!
I’m having a beach day, water you doing today?
Don’t worry, beach happy!
How are you? Because I’m fin-tastic!
I’m sick and tide of these beach puns!
What’s up, buoys and gulls?
Beach Jokes for Couples
Summer is what we are looking forward every year because of a lot of reasons. Start planning a trip and rekindle your summer love with our beach jokes for couples. You’ll surely love it.
I’m either bent or in love.
When I see you I feel tingly.
Are you a member of the dive crew?
You’ve turned my heart into knots.
Are your legs tired?
You’ve been swimming through my mind all night.
Your eyes are like the ocean and I’m lost at sea.
Yarrr, that’s the finest booty I’ve ever seen.
Laugh out loud with our BEST Butt Jokes That Are Just Booty-ful
You better stay away from the compressor room.
You’re so hot you’re on fire!
Would you like to see my special buddy breathing technique?
I need emergency oxygen, because you just took my breath away.
Can you navigate on this dive?
I keep getting lost in your eyes.
Excuse me, there’s no smoking on this dive boat.
I’m not smoking.
Yes you are….
Care to do an equipment inspection?
Dirty Beach Jokes (NOT For Kids)
Up for some dirty beach jokes? These collection of jokes are totally not for kids. Spice things up with your lover with our silly and dirty beach jokes.
Are you the deep end?
Because I’m ready to dive right in.
Ignore the ray bans.
There is nothing shade-y about me.
I’ll show you my tan lines if you show me yours.
I’m drowning in the sun and need mouth to mouth now!
That bathing suit would look a lot better on the floor next to my bed.
I seem to have sand in my bathing suit, wanna help me get it out?
Will you teach my tongue how to surf?
Can I swim in your beautiful blue eyes?
Nice beach balls, can I play?
Summary: FUNNY Beach Jokes That Will SHOREly Make You Laugh!
Now that you got your perfect text for your Instagram summer photo, it is time to put away the the phone and enjoy the sand beneath your feet.
For a rainy day, here is much more amazing quotes and jokes that will make your day: