Basketball is such a fun sport and what amazing is it brings people together. We may not know all the rules about it but who cares, right? It always feels good to cheer for your favorite team especially if they are winning! But if this isn’t your day, don’t worry, we have something to cheer you up. Have a look at our funny basketball jokes and laugh together with your friends and family.
If you are in the mood for some more sports jokes, check our Funny Baseball Jokes.
Good Basketball Jokes and Riddles
Are you a fan of basketball? I bet you are into NBA Championships, The Final Four, March Madness, or even your local state tournament. I can’t blame you. People watch basketball with friends and families because it makes them happy and relaxed.
Indeed, it is a great happiness booster. Just don’t forget that our collection of jokes are also here for good laughs.
Why are basketball players messy eaters?
Because they’re always dribbling.
Why do basketball players love cookies?
Because they can dunk them!
Why can’t dinosaurs play basketball?
Because they are dead.
Basketball sued Tennis for no reason.
Now they have to go to court.
What do the stock market and Knicks season ticket holders have in common?
They both get negative returns.
Why can’t you get a fairly officiated basketball game in the jungle?
Because of the cheetahs.
Why are the Dallas Mavericks going to change their name to the Possums?
Because they play dead at home and they die on the road.
What’s the difference between a basketball player and a dog?
One drool, the other dribbles.
What do you do when you see an elephant driving down the lane with a basketball?
Get out of the way.
What type of cheese do basketball players love?
How were the scrambled eggs like the losing basketball team?
They’d both been beaten.
For more laughs, check our food jokes and puns that are totally hilarious!
Why does an octopus perform poorly on a basketball court?
It’s always getting tentacle fouls.
Why was the hoops player charged with a crime?
She shot the ball.
What does a Bulls fan doing after watching his team win?
Rewind the tape.
What do you say when you miss a basket?
What’s the difference between Carmelo Anthony and time.
What do basketball players do when they can no longer see?
They become referees.
Did you hear about the basketball team that doesn’t have a website?
Apparently, they can’t string three “W’s” together.
What does a Timberwolves fan do after winning the Finals?
Turn off the Playstation and go to bed.
Why can’t basketball players go on a vacation?
Because that would be traveling.
Did you hear the Atlanta Hawks don’t have a website?
They can’t string three W’s together.
Why was Cinderella thrown off the basketball team?
She ran away from the ball.
What’s the difference between the New York Knicks and a dollar bill?
You can still get four quarters out of a dollar bill.
What is the difference between a Suns fan and a baby?
The baby will stop whining after a while.
How many New York Knicks players does it take to change a tire?
One, unless it’s a blowout, in which case they all show up.
Laugh out loud with our Hilarious New York Jokes
If a basketball team was chasing a baseball team, what time would it be?
Five after nine.
Why doesn’t Albany have a professional basketball team?
Because then New York City would want one too.
What do you call a person who walks back and forth screaming one minute, then sits down weeping uncontrollably the next?
A basketball coach.
What do you call 12 millionaires around a TV watching the NBA Finals?
The Detroit Pistons.
What’s the difference between treasury bonds and OKC fans?
Treasury bonds eventually mature.
Short Basketball Puns
Enjoy our funny basketball puns that we have for you. Enjoy our collection with your friend and families.
If you want a loyal marriage, get hitched to a basketball player.
He will never pass you, rather he will keep you all to himself.
Longfellow is the known poet of basketball.
The judge sentenced the basketball player to life imprisonment because he shot the ball.
Do you know how to dunk cookies?
Ask a basketball ball chef.
Basketball players at times get athletes foot.
Come to think of it, it is like the missle toe astronauts get.
Basketball players manage to remain cool even during tough matches because they stay closer to the fans.
What is the favorite sport for the young bass?
It is the bass get ball.
Many basketball players fail their tests in school because they do not want to pass.
What are the favorite video games for basketball players?
Ummh, shooting stars.
Laugh more: Funny Video Game Jokes
The only time a basketball team can chase a baseball team is five after nine.
When she saw all the madness around her, March said, “what’s all that bracket”.
Do you want to know what you get when you cross a newborn snake with a basketball?
Really! Ooh you will end up with a bouncing baby boa.
The perfect name for a pig that plays basketball is a ball hog.
We all sat by the fireplace listening to the basket baller’s story.
At some point, I found it unbelievable. It was such a tall tale!
I saw the chicken quickly crossing the basketball court?
Then I remembered that the referee was blowing fowls.
The team’s star basketball player decided to remain at home the entire weekend.
He didn’t want to be called out for travelling.
Everyone wondered why Cinderella was such a bad player.
If only they knew, her coach was a pumpkin.
Laugh more here: Funny Pumpkin Jokes
It is not uncommon for elephants to start a stampede.
Especially if they want to play for the Chargers.
When the basketball realized all the checks were bouncing, he decided to visit the bank himself to find out.
If you see an elephant with a basketball, simply get out of the way.
Basketball players are not that patient to follow-through an elaborate court-ship procedure.
Basketball players make good husbands.
They never shoot their wives.
The basketball player was sentenced 5 years in prison after he shot the ball.
Scrambled eggs are similar to a losing basketball team because both are beaten.
The only difference between time and a ball hog is that the former passes.
It is ridiculous having a basketball team that lacks a website.
Do you mean none of them can string three W’s together?
Basketball is the only sport where the basket is filled but never gets full.
Before they go out to a basketball game, all cheerleaders down several bottles of root beer.
Are you still wondering why the basketball player could listen to his music?
Don’t you know he broke a record!
Laugh more here: Funny Music Jokes
Flirty Basketball Jokes
Ready to score some points? Having a sense of humour is something that girls are looking for. Our flirty basketball jokes will make your cheerleaders giggle.
Laugh more: Hilarious Flirty Jokes
Honey, you’re a slam dunk!
If I were a basketball team, I’d be Indiana Pacers. Know why?
We both have solid D.
Hey, are you Dennis Rodman?
Because I’ll be your rebound!
I must be Kobe because I can’t pass you up.
I think you’re a basketball fan because each time I looked at you, my D. Rose.
Are you a lot on the court?
Because I’m looking for someone who wants to follow an elaborate COURTship procedure with me.
Want to play basketball together?
You need the balls. I have the hoop!
If you played basketball, you would be the center. Of my attention.
I play basketball.
I’m really good at scoring from all sorts of positions.
I like you more than America likes basketball.
Are you a basketball?
Because I all I imagine doing is laying you up.
I would be a really lousy basketball player with you as my ball.
I’d never shoot you because I’d miss you too much.
Your Knicks jersey is amazing!
Can I wear it after we have sex?
Your first name must be Kevin because my last name is Love.
What do you say we make tonight about scoring?
And I’m not talking about points.
Want to play basketball?
If you’re the Bulls, I’m definitely the Heat!
Do you know what my fantasy is?
Treat me like you treat that basketball!
Hey baby, wanna see my Magic Johnson?
You must play defense because you definitely stole my heart.
You’re so pretty, you make me Linsane.
If you let me hit this spin move on you, you’re gonna fall in love.
You hooped my heart from the minute I saw you.
Do you play basketball?
I’d let you dribble your balls between my legs.
What’s your favorite thing about basketball?
Mine is foul playing.
Your handles got me on my knees.
Do you have a jersey?
Because I’ma need your name and number.
Want to play basketball at my place?
I can show you how good I am with balls.
Can I wear your jersey?
Because I really like your name and I also really want your number.
Basketball One Liners
You will be surprised that it takes only one NCAA basketball player to change a light bulb, but in exchange he gets 3 credit hours, a car and loads of money as well.
Thieves can be good basketball players because they are so good at shooting, stealing, and running.
My brother thinks he’s good at basketball.
He says, “I’ve been Duncan my whole life!”
Laugh more here: Hilarious Brother Jokes
Cinderella was thrown off the basketball team reason being she ran away from the ball.
The basketball player sat on the sideline and began sketching pictures of chickens.
He was learning how to draw fowls.
If you make a mistake of playing basketball with pigs, they will hog the ball.
You cannot get a basketball game fairly officiated in the jungle because cheetahs are all over.
The main difference between a dog and a basketball player is that one dribbles while the other one drools.
Read: More funny jokes about animals
Extra: Women’s Basketball Jokes
Who says basketball are just for men? Women’s basketball started in the late 1800s. We can say that it has come a long way and the game continues to evolve for women which is really great.
Anyway, before we bore you to much with all this history, take some time and enjoy our jokes about women’s basketball.
Making Love to a Woman is a Lot Like Playing Basketball.
Well, they’re similar in the sense that I’ve done neither.
TIL Dennis Rodman once tried to start a topless women’s basketball league.
The league flopped due to too little support.
Two basketball teams play a game. The home team wins, but not a single man from either team scored a basket. How could this be?
It was a women’s basketball team!
Let’s stop with the zone defense, I’d much rather do man-to-woman coverage.
Knock Knock Jokes about Basketball
Last but not the list, check out our hilarious knock knock jokes about basketball. You will totally love it and you will definitely won’t stop laughing at these jokes.
Canoe come over and play basketball with me?
Dozen anyone want to come and play basketball?
Fred I can’t play basketball today!
Take meow to the ball game!
Les go and play basketball!
Keep Uriah on the ball!
Wanda buy a new basketball?
Summary: Funny Basketball Jokes
Did you enjoy our collection of jokes for kids? Had enough giggles and laughter? We hope you did because we have more.
Since you stayed until the end, here are more jokes for kids and adults:
- Funny quotes
- Funny clean jokes for work
- Jokes for Teens (that are funny!)
- Funny Questions (and answers)
- Chemistry Jokes
- Love Jokes
- Coffee Puns and Jokes
- Star Wars Jokes
- Science Jokes
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