31 best Boss Jokes

31 Best Boss Jokes and Puns

You are looking for funny boss jokes to tell around the office? This is just the right place. We have collected the 31 best and funny jokes for boss. Some of them are for employees only, others could be so funny, even your boss wants to hear them.

We have collected jokes for employees about bosses, and jokes for bosses themself. Pick the right one for you! Make sure you read as well our hilarious monday jokes for offices.

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Just so you know; some bosses do not have the best sense of humor. So better make sure you know your boss well enough BEFORE you throw in some jokes about the boss.

Here are our favorite office jokes (you may want to share right away).

And obviously, you should read our best weekend jokes – best for enjoying on a Friday with a cocktail in your hand.

Our knock knock jokes compilation will also make you laugh!

Our Favorite Boss Jokes

Gather your strength before you throw these jokes about your boss!


My boss gets really annoyed when I call him “Dick”.

My boss gets really annoyed when I call him dick


Why did the can crusher quit her job?
Because it was so-da pressing.


You know what a clean desk is a sign of?
A cluttered desk drawer.


My boss send me an email.

Boss: “Send me a joke”

Me: “I am working right now!”

Boss: “That was a great one! Send me another one!”


My boss told me to have a good day.

So I went home!


The boss says I have a preoccupation with vengeance.

We’ll see about that…


All I ask is for a chance to prove that money can’t make me happy.


Why did the cookie go to the doctor?

It felt crummy.


What is the best way to criticize your boss?

Very quietly, so he cannot hear you.


The boss asks what is my asset?

It’s my eyes.


Just saved my boss from a murder. I went home early.


I think my job interview to be a bug sorter went well. I boxed all the right ticks.


You know what job I could really see myself doing?

A mirror inspector.

boss jokes


I refused to believe my road worker father was stealing from his job, but when I got home, all the signs were there.

Read: Eye-rolling best Dad jokes


My week’s so rough that after Monday and Tuesday even my calendar says WTF


I told my boss that three companies were after me and I need a raise….

My boss asked “what companies? “

Gas, water and electricity company.


I have a joke on designers, but our humor may not be aligned.


I came out of the closet to my boss and was fired on the spot
He’s still asking how I got in his closet.


I just heard my boss is going to fire the employee with the worst posture. I have a hunch that might be me.
I’m great at multitasking. I can waste time, be unproductive and procrastinate — all at once!


I just wrote a book on reverse psychology. Do not read it.


You know what kind of tea is the hardest to swallow?
Reali-tea.


My boss pulled me aside at work one day
And said you’re a high functioning alcoholic, I asked him how he knew that I was also high


I got a job at a paperless office.
Everything was great until I needed to use the bathroom.


My boss said I’m a worker worth paying attention to.
Unfortunately, he said it to the security guard.


I have a joke on content writers, but double negatives are a no-no so I won’t say it.


Boss: Why do you….

Me: *pssst*

Boss: What is your biggest weakn…

Me: *pssssssst*

Boss: (whispering) you’re hired, welcome to the library!


What do your boss and a slinky have in common?

They’re both fun to watch tumble down the stairs.


I used to want to become a historian.

Then I realized, there was really no future in it.


Told my Boss that I have Corona.

He thought I was talking about the Virus and gave me paid leave for 2 Months. More beer for me, I guess!

Laugh more: Best Covid-19 Jokes about Quarantine and Lockdown


My boss asked me to start the presentation with a joke.
So I put my paycheck as the first slide.


Why did the employee get fired from the calendar factory?
He took a day off.


My boss asked me how good I was at making spreadsheets.
I told him I Excel at it.


How is Christmas like your job?
You do all the work and the fat guy in the suit gets all the credit.

Read: the best holiday jokes


I have a joke on my boss, but let me first overwork myself.

I have a joke on content writers, but double negatives are a no-no so I won't say it.


When your boss cracks a joke and you laugh like “ahahahahagivemaraisehahaha


I have a joke on developers, but it’s in a code.

Laugh more: best nerdy jokes of all time


Boss: How good are you at PowerPoint?

Me: I excel at it.

Boss: was this a Microsoft Office pun?

Me: Word!


My boss denied my time-off request. But the flight is booked. So I hope she figures something out.

Laugh more: 49 best travel jokes and puns


Funny Jokes for Boss

Are you a chef, a boss? Well, joke is on you…or not. Below we have a bunch of joke that are funny for bosses and everybody going that direction.


My boss send me an email.

Boss: “Send me a joke”
Me: “I am working right now!”
Boss: “That was a great one! Send me another one!”


I don’t always ask my employees how they are. But when I do, I walk away before they can answer.


Whoever smiles t their work is either high or really bad at their job.


Boss: “Hey, why haven’t you submitted the files yet?”

Me: “The corona thing was really hard and stressful.”

Boss: “It is 2049, get the job done!”

Laugh more: funny lockdown jokes with insider jokes…


Employee: Good morning, Boss. I cannot come to work today due to heavy rain. I am living on an island now.

Boss: In your application you put swimming as your hobbies. See you at work!


I have a joke on clients, but they won’t be able to afford it.


I always tell new hires:

Don’t think of me as your boss. Think of me as a friend that can fire you.


My boss arrived at work with a brand new Ferrari.

Me: “wow, that is an amazing car”

Boss: “if you work hard, put in the hours, and strive for excellence, I can buy myself another one next year!”


My boss called me this morning.

Boss: Where the f*** are you? It’s 8:30 and you were supposed to start at 8.

Me: Relax, I’m in my office.

Boss: Quit the shit! I’m standing in your office.

Me: Oh, sorry mate, I forgot to tell you about my new job.


A CEO who was replaced for poor performance decided to help the new CEO.

“I left you with four envelopes. When you’re faced with a crisis you can’t handle, open the first envelope. Faced with additional crisis after that, open the second, third, and fourth envelopes.”

When the new CEO encountered his first crisis he opened the first envelope.

A note inside said “Blame the previous CEO.” It worked like a charm.

Months later after the second crisis, the note in the second envelope said, “Blame the economy.” That worked, but not quite as well.

A few weeks later a third crisis occurred and the third note said “Blame the workers.” That didn’t work at all, so the new CEO opened the fourth envelope.

It said, “Prepare four envelops.”


3 CEO’s were in a jail cell.

The first guy said “I got put in here because I raised my prices and the government accused me of price gouging”

The second guy replied, “Really, I got put here because I lowered my prices and the government accused me of unfair competition!”

The third guy then said, “Damn, I got put here because I just set my prices to the market level and I got accused of collusion!”


Best Funny Boss Jokes One Liners

Looking for more work jokes? Giggle a little bit with our one liner short boss jokes that we have compiled for you.


My boss told me to stop acting like a flamingo, so I had to put my foot down.

My boss told me to stop acting like a flamingo, so I had to put my foot down.


I told my female colleague that she drew her eyebrows too high. She seemed surprised.


I’ve found a job helping a one armed typist do capital letters. It’s shift work.


A positive attitude may not solve all your problems, but it will annoy enough people to make it worth the effort.


My last boss said I have a preoccupation with vengeance…we’ll see about that.


My resume? A list of things I hope future employers never ask me to do.


Old journalists don’t retire, they are just de-pressed.


The trouble with being punctual for business meetings is that nobody’s there to appreciate it.


The closest people come to perfection is on an employment application.


If Apple delved into the car manufacturing market, would they have Windows?


Of all the inventions of the last century, the dry erase board is the most remarkable.


A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered drawer.


I love being a maze designer, it’s so easy to get lost in my work.


I got fired from the orange juice factory…I just couldn’t concentrate.

I got fired from the orange juice factory


Supervisor Jokes and Manager Jokes

Jokes about supervisors and managers that will make your friends and families laugh out loud!


Why doesn’t Superman need a boss?
He already has supervision.


I had a rough childhood. I couldn’t play with toys that required supervision.
I only had regular vision


What do you call a ghost asking for the manager?
I don’t know what to call it!!!! It keeps s-Karen me!!!!


Count Dracula is a terrible project manager…
… He always avoid the stakeholders.


What do you call a car that wants to speak to the manager?
A McKaren


What did the produce manager tells his daughter who wanted to run away with her boyfriend?
You cantaloupe!


I got pizza for everyone the day I started my new job as manager…
It was my first order of business


A good project manager makes updates.
A bad project manager makes up dates.

A good project manager makes updates


Best Jokes by Michael Scott

Break the ice with that new employee with these office jokes.


Are you familiar with Michael Scott from the show THE OFFICE?


This is one of the most beloved and most hilarious bosses there is. Here is a video of the best jokes by him.


“You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take. – Wayne Gretzky” – Michael Scott


“Do I need to be liked? Absolutely not. I like to be liked. I enjoy being liked. I have to be liked. But it’s not like this compulsive need like my need to be praised.”


“I learned a while back that if I do not text 911, people do not return my calls. Um, but people always return my calls because they think that something horrible has happened.”


“I… Declare…. Bankruptcy!”


“You don’t know me, you’ve just seen my penis.”


“And I knew exactly what to do. But in a much more real sense, I had no idea what to do.”


“I feel like all my kids grew up and then they married each other. It’s every parent’s dream.”


“If I had a gun with two bullets and I was in a room with Hitler, Bin Laden, and Toby, I would shoot Toby twice.”


“Society teaches us that having feelings and crying is bad and wrong. Well, that’s baloney, because grief isn’t wrong. There’s such a thing as good grief. Just ask Charlie Brown.”


“I have cause. It is beCAUSE I hate him.”

More Jokes you will love (and make you laugh?)

Had fun with funny jokes about bosses? We have collected even more jokes you will absolutely love. These are as well great to share with friends and fellow work mates:

Over to you:

Do you have your own favorite office joke? Share it with us in the comments below!

Jimmy
I am Jimmy, clown at heart. I love silly, funny, nerdy, quirky jokes. So I thought I should start a website about jokes. Why a carrot as a logo? Why not! Here, have a carrot!