Looking for food jokes? Food is more enjoyable when you’re happy and we all agree to that. So, for today’s menu, we compiled a list of delicious and funny jokes about foods that vegan and meat-eaters will laugh off to. Perfect for any diet, this food humor will keep you full from breakfast until midnight snack.
Read our lists and pick out your favorites. It’s a buffet! Just hope you’re not allergic to anything.
Don’t forget to smile…
- Corny Jokes for Adults
- Funny quotes
- Funny clean jokes for work
- Jokes for Teens (that are funny!)
- Funny Questions (and answers)
- Chemistry Jokes
Yummy Food Jokes That Will Leave You Laughing With A Full Appetite
Looking for funny jokes and puns about food? Well, you’re in luck as we compile a list of funny food jokes and food jokes one-liners that you can share at your dinner jokes session. We aim to satiate your hunger for laughter. Check out this list and laugh out loud with your friends and family.
My friend thinks he is smart.
He told me an onion is the only food that makes you cry, so I threw a coconut at his face.
Your Mama so fat, the Bears hid their food when she goes camping
Why did the peanut butter run across the busy highway?
It was nuts.
A teacher asked her students to use the word “beans” in a sentence.
“My father grows beans,” said one girl.
“My mother cooks beans,” said a boy.
A third student spoke up, “We are all human beans.”
Relationships are like Indian food.
They start out hot and spicy but end up with someone on the toilet crying and saying why me.
My Chinese waiter thinks all white people look alike and gave my food to the wrong customer
Wait. Never mind. That wasn’t my waiter.
Why did the cookie go to the hospital?
Because it felt crummy.
I placed an order to pick up some food for dinner.
The person taking my order asked for a name and number.
I said, “Stephen… and let’s go with 7”.
I had Indian food for lunch and almost choked on it
Talk about a paneer-death experience
“Look Dad! The clowns are leaving the circus to go get food!”
“Son how many times do I have to tell you? Those are called *Senators* leaving the *Capitol*”
I started a business that takes stock photos of food.
I call it Spaghetti images.
What do you call a fake noodle?
I made a vegetable joke
But no one carrot all.
Yesterday I gave my food to a beggar…..
….and today the beggar gave me a book titled “HOW TO COOK”.
This guy was claiming that onions are the only food that can make you cry.
So I threw a coconut at his face.
I was hosting a dinner party and everyone thought my food was bad
Except the smoke detector, that thought it was fire
What do you call cheese that isn’t yours?
Funny Food Riddles
I bet you’re looking for a recipe and ended up reading this instead. Well, if you’re looking to serve more than delicious food on the dinner table then you’re not in the wrong place. Check out these funny corny jokes that will leave everyone thinking and laughing at the same time.
What does an upset chef make food with?
What do you call stoned Mexicans?
What is the trigonometry teacher’s favorite food?
What do you call a fast food company that also manufactures airliners?
Why did the can crusher quit his job?
Because it was soda pressing.
What is it called when an injured man dies from food poisoning?
Soup de grace.
What Does Enya Use To Season Her Food?
What do you call a baptized Mexican?
How much room is needed for fungi to grow?
As mushroom as possible
What do horses say when their food gets stolen?
Hay come back!
In which school do you learn to make ice cream?
Why do hamburgers go to the gym?
To get better buns!
What do you call a food fight that’s been going on for years?
A war of nutrition
Why don’t people In wheelchairs make food by a recipe?
The recipe needs to go step-by-step
My least favorite food?
Sausage, specifically from Germany…They’re the wurst.
What food delivery service does Harry Potter prefer?
Why do bananas have to wear sunscreen?
Because they peel.
What kind of food do they serve at Medieval Times?
Farm to Fable.
What is Batman’s least favorite food?
Are there any foods that start with ‘th’?
Thoup and thauthages
Knock Knock Jokes About Food
Kids can be picky at times especially with their food, and we know that you can’t actually eat this joke foods list. But it can make every meal special with your little ones. We listed here corny food jokes that will definitely tickle your funny bone.
Noah good place we can get something to eat?
Oswald my chewing gum by mistake!
Pasta la vista, gringo.
Orange you glad to see me?
Pasta salt please.
Peanut going down a slide!
Peas of the rock!
Pete-za – but you took so long I’ve already eaten it!
Pecan somebody your own size!
Adult Food Jokes
Here is something spicy. Whether you’re looking to spice things up on your dinner date or just trying to look for the joke of the day for adults, these hot and naughty food jokes and puns will keep your Ice cream Popsicle from melting. Check out and enjoy our food jokes for adults.
Dark humor is like food.
Some people don’t get it.
People be like I am fat because my mother cooks good food…
…I am like I am single because I have strong hands.
What did the grape say when it was crushed?
Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
Why did the tomato blush?
Because it saw the salad dressing.
I accidentally swallowed some food coloring…
The doctor says I’m ok, but I feel like I’m dyeing inside.
I used to assume that if a chef is fat, it means that their food is good.
Then I learned: Never judge a cook by his blubber.
It’s strange disliking Chinese food while having an Asian Fetish
I’d like to eat out Chinese but I hate eating out Chinese
Quarantine has turned us into dogs.
We roam the house all day looking for food. We are told “no” if we get too close to strangers. And we get really excited about car rides.
Read more: Funny jokes about animals to share with your friends and family
I started a new diet this week. So I abstain from eating any food while I put my mittens on in the winter.
I call it inter-mitten fasting.
What do you call a hooker that asks for payment in Italian food?
Why couldn’t the sesame seed leave the gambling casino?
Because he was on a roll.
What food does a stoner serve his guests at a party?
Pot Roast. Ba dum dum
Dark humor is like food…
I indulged in an unhealthy amount of it today, and now i want to kill myself.
What is common between a gynecologist and a food delivery person?
They both can smell it but can’t taste it.
What’s a sea monster’s favorite food?
Fish and ships.
Diet Day 1…I’ve finally got rid of all the fattening food from the house.
It was delicious.
My roommate keeps stealing my food so I ground up Pepper and made cupcakes with it.
Pepper was a dumb thing to name his dog anyway.
I just couldn’t decide which asian takeout food I like the best, Japanese or Chinese.
I ended up calling it a Thai.
What food did the Italian wife make before a night of kinky activities?
What’s a vampire’s favorite ethnic food?
Maxi Pad Thai.
Fast Food Jokes
It’s true; too much fast food can make you gain weight. But did you also know that laughter is a good core workout? Laugh off what you ate with this joke on food list.
Why did the man climb to the roof of the fast food restaurant?
The told him the meal was on the house!
Where are the best tacos served?
In the Gulp of Mexico!
How many vegans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Five: One to screw in the light bulb, and four to protest in front of McDonald’s.
Why don’t they have any toilet paper in KFC?
Because its finger licking good!
What do a gynocologist and a pizza boy have in common?
They can smell it but they cant eat it!
How did Burger King get Diary Queen Pregnant?
He forgot to wrap his whopper.
Where does the one legged waitress work?
Chuck Norris invented his own size of Whopper.
Chuck Norris went to McDonalds and asked for a Whopper and got one!
How did Burger King propose to his girlfriend?
With an onion ring.
What did the boy say when he chased the food?
That’s fast food!
Why is it called “Fast Food”?
It’s called “fast” food because you’re supposed to eat it really fast. Otherwise, you might actually taste it.
Why did the french fry win the race?
Because it was fast food!
What did Little Caesars say to Wendys?
You’ll always have a pizza my heart.
What Dr Seuss book do they read every morning in Canada?
Tim Hortons Hears a Who.
Did you hear McDonald killed Burger King in front of Five Guys over that skank Wendy?
The funeral is at White Castle. I’m taking Dairy Queen.
What do you get if you play McDonald’s Monopoly 30 Days Straight?
Read: Check out these Food Quotes and Captions That Will Make You Crave For More!
Why is your Mom like a Big Mac?
Because she’s full of fat and only worth a buck.
What’s thick, white and comes in your burger?
What is peter pans favorite place to eat?
I dont know!….WENDYS
Did you see the Will Smith movie about McDonalds?
It’s called the “Pursuit of Happy Meals”
Why don’t Americans eat snails?
Because they like “Fast Food”.
Why did the rooster cross the road?
He heard that the chickens at KFC were pretty hot.
Why is Fast Food increasing illegal immigration?
“Fast” food slows you down when it hits your stomach, parks there, and lets the fat have time to get off and apply for citizenship.
Where do they hold prizefights in Fastfoodland?
In an onion ring!
What do you call a pig thief?
What did the hamburger say to the other hamburger in the bathroom?
Why did the rooster cross the road to KFC?
To see a chicken strip.
Why did Five Guys survive the flood?
Because it was built on solid ground beef.
Why did the chicken go to Burger King?
To see a chicken strip.
What’s better than a talking burrito?
What did the frog order at McDonald’s?
French flies and a diet Croak
Pizza is everyone’s favorite. One of the most versatile dish in the world. Like a blank canvass, you can do whatever you want with your pizza. Thick or thin, different choices of toppings, you can even put pineapples in it if you want, and most importantly, you can joke about it. A secret to making the most delicious pizza puns? Put some extra cheese puns and you should be good to go. This list of pizza and cheese jokes can keep you distracted while you wait for the pizza guy to come.
I like how my local pizza place cuts my pizza into 6 slices instead of 8.
I can’t finish 8 slices.
What did the kid say after eating a frozen pizza?
Well, that wasn’t very thawed out.
I burnt my Hawaiian pizza the other day…
I should have cooked it on aloha temperature.
What did the Dalai Lama say when he walked into a pizza parlor?
He says, “Make me one with everything.”
What did the pizza say when it went out on a date?
“I never sausage a beautiful face.”
If pizza could talk, what would it say?
Probably lots of cheesy things.
What do you get if you cross 27 knives and a pizza?
I’m going to open a restaurant that only serves crabs and pizza.
I’ll call it the Crust Station.
What’s a pizza maker’s favorite song?
“Slice, Slice Baby.”
What are you if can’t decide what kind of pizza to get?
What do you call a fake pizza?
A pepperphony pizza.
What’s the difference between a good pizza joke and a bad one?
Wood fired pizza?
How’s pizza gonna get a job now?
Why does the mushroom always get invited to pizza parties?
Because he’s such a fungi!
Why was the pizzeria desperate for business?
Because they kneaded the dough.
How do you fix a broken pizza?
With tomato paste.
What do you call it when a tired dad makes pizza?
Papa Yawns Pizza.
Funny Jokes About Cooking
Whether you’re a good cook or not, you can enjoy and get to laugh at these cooking jokes. We have compiled the best and freshest ingredients we can find so you can cook up a joke and share with your loved ones. Check out these jokes about cooks list.
The culinary world was sad when the old French chef died.
He wasn’t able to cook and thus lost huile d’olive!
There was a poker game among the chefs.
However, a couple of chefs decided not to participate, as the steaks were too high!
What do you call a TV show which depicts the best chef from all over Thailand?
Why was Jason kicked out of the secret cooking group?
Because he kept on spilling the beans!
Once, an old chef taught others to use mint in their dishes to make them taste more exciting.
He always gave them sage advice!
Me and a couple of friends went camping. Sitting beside the bonfire and telling stories is customary.
However, we all need to be-ef frank with one another!
Read more: Funny BEST Friend Jokes That Will Knock Them Over!
Billie Joe Armstrong never uses the help of any assistants while cooking as he woks alone!
Dwayne Johnson and his family contracted a bad flu.
Whenever Dwayne cooks his food now, I guess his family doesn’t smell what the Rock is cooking!
Cooking meat dishes for little men is one of my specialties.
Make gnome mistake!
What is the cooking show’s name, which allows you to use one pan throughout the competition?
You Think You Have The Skillet Takes!
Why did the chef put his hand in the hot cooking pot?
Because he was feeling a tad chili!
What did the chef say to the boiling water when he was cooking pasta?
Goodbye, you are going to be mist!
The police inquired about the accident in the kitchen, and the pastry chef said it happened right in front of his berry eyes!
As the young boy was about to join a culinary school, his father advised him not to give in to pear pressure!
While cooking, I got ketchup in my eye, but I didn’t wash it because Heinzsight is 20/20!
Aerosmith loved Chinese food, and as a result, they gave a perfect tribute to it with their song ‘Wok This Way’.
My wife experiences occasional trouble cooking, but that’s not an issue for me at all.
I bae-leaf in her!
I wanted to cook mushrooms at a cooking competition, but it was a one-off chance.
There was not mushroom for error!
What is the common thing you have between a film production and a lunch consisting of meat and veggies in a tortilla?
In the end, both are a wrap!
What is the best thing that Afghanis do when they have nothing ready?
They can Kabul up anything!
My wife and I got into a fight as she claimed I used too much spice.
I asked her how she could accuse me and baste on what!
I once learned how to cook young swans.
Till today it is one of my Cygnet-ure dishes!
The only reason why the hipster chef burnt his mouth is that he ate his food before it became cool!
It was heart-wrenching for young cooks when the legendary Italian chef pasta way!
There were two chefs who always worked in the kitchen.
They were taste buds!
What would happen when you drop an entire package of corn starch in the pot?
It turned out to be a thickening experience!
How do you cook good corn?
By splitting any hairs about it!
Why did the man want to become a chef?
He wanted to figure out and add some spice to his life!
What do you do to prevent your gyro meat from drying?
You need to give it a good lamb basting!
Ice Cream Puns
Everybody loves Ice Cream and a good joke and pairing the two is a really good combination. If you want to make someone laugh on your ice cream date then these funny puns are the perfect. Check out the list.
Anything is popsicle.
Get here as soon as popsicle.
Snap, crackle, pop-sicle.
Things are about to pop-sicle off.
Livin the cream.
Be part of the cream team.
You’re the cream of the crop.
Just another manic sundae.
Sundae is my favorite day of the week.
Halo darkness, my old friend.
Halo from the other side.
Today’s forecast is sunny with a chance of sprinkles.
Just a little sprinkle today.
Ice cream because you are driving me crazy.
Ice cream, because I’m so excited about this ice cream.
Hey ice cream, wanna spoon?
Hope your birthday is gelato fun.
Laugh out loud with Hilarious Birthday Jokes and Puns Ideas
I would buy all the ice cream in the world if I won the gelato-ry .
This is going to take up gelato my time.
I don’t cone-done that behavior.
Game of Cones is the best show ever.
I love you un-cone-ditionally.
My cone worst enemy.
My one and cone-ly.
You cone do it!
You make me melt.
There are so many things you can do with eggs. Hard boiled, sunny side up, scrambled, poached, deviled and other techniques I failed to mention. Egg puns and jokes are just as versatile. Here are some egg-samples that will surely crack you up.
How can you tell where the Easter Bunny’s been?
Eggs marks the spot!
How does the Easter Bunny stay in shape during the off season?
He gets lots of eggs-ercise!
Why should you be careful about what you say around egg whites?
Everyone knows they can’t take a yolk.
How do you make an egg roll?
Just give it a little push!
Did you hear about the hen who laid her egg on an axe?
She wanted to hatchet.
How does the Easter Bunny feel after she’s made all her deliveries?
Why did it take the chicken so long to cross the road?
There was no eggs-press lane!
Why do so many people love a boiled egg for breakfast?
It’s so hard to beat.
How did the omelet find out she was ill?
She had a medical eggs-am!
What did the egg say after someone bumped into her?
Why did the Easter egg hide?
He was a little chicken!
What is an egg’s least favorite day of the week?
What’s the worst crime as far as an egg is concerned?
Where can you go to learn more about eggs?
What do you call a smart omelet?
An egg head!
Why did the new egg feel so good?
Because he just got laid!
Why did the egg regret being in an omelet?
It wasn’t all it was cracked up to be!
What did the egg say after it was ghosted?
Why the hell are you egg-noring me?
What did Snow White name her hen?
Why were the eggs running so fast?
They were afraid of being beaten!
Junk Food Jokes
We know too much junk food is not good, and we are guilty of snacking on it more than we should. We love it because it’s tasty and easy to eat, and we bet that you’ll love these jokes too. We compiled a list of tasty, MSG-free junk food jokes you can snack on anytime of the day.
What do you call a sleeping pizza?
Why did the boy put a candy bar under his pillow?
So, he would have sweet dreams!
If Jake has 30 chocolate bars, and eats 25, what does he have?
Diabetes…. Jake has diabetes…
What is the Wikipedia definition for a donut?
A poor man’s substitute for women.
Why couldn’t the teddy bear finish his dessert?
Because he was stuffed.
What’s Tiger Woods favorite brand of potato chips?
Why did the ice cream truck break down?
Because of the Rocky Road.
When can a pizza marry a hot dog?
After they have a very frank relationship!
What is a man’s idea of a balanced diet?
A bag of potato chips in each hand!
How do you learn how to make ice cream?
In Sunday (Sundae) School.
What does it do before it rains candy?
When should you take a cookie to the doctor?
When it feels crummy.
What does a gambling addict eat?
Poker chips and salsa.
What is a monkey’s favorite cookie?
What does an excited fat kid do in the junk food isle?
The Moon-Pies Walk.
Why did the Oreo go to the dentist?
Because it lost its filling.
How did Reese eat her ice cream?
What’s the difference between a pizza and my pizza jokes?
My pizza jokes can’t be topped!
How do you know your close to a Frito Lay factory?
Because of the chips and dip in the road.
What are the 4 major food groups?
Pizza, Coffee, Chocolate and Sex.
Why do you always bring a bag of chips to a party?
In queso emergency.
What do you get if you divide the circumference of a bowl of ice cream by its diameter?
Pi a’la mode.
What do you call a monkey that sells potato chips?
Time to catch your breath
That’s the wrap. We should have warned that this will stir up an appetite. the good news is that you will remember something funny while eating, making the meal much more savory. Don’t forget to check up other funny jokes you could share with friends, on weekends, or in the office.
Don’t forget to smile…